He’s like a kid in a china shop

I heard this one from a neighbor.  She was talking about her husband’s love of gadgets, and that he recently received a new tool that he was crazy about.  This is an incongruent conflation of “like a kid in a candy shop” (so excited about something that they behave in a child-like way) and “like a bull in a china shop” (clumsily destructive).  The mixup derives from the similar sounding words “china” and “candy”, the word “shop” used in both phrases, and that the two phrases are equal in words and structure (“like a blank in a blank shop”).

 


Right out of the get-go

This was heard on a podcast.  It is a nice congruent conflation of “from the get-go” and “right out of the gate” (immediately, right from the start).  Lots of alliteration in this one, contibuting to the mashup.  This is not a malaphor in Pittsburgh, however.  It means “just finished getting gas”.  A big thanks to Vicki Ameel-Kovacs for hearing this one!


It’s a collusion witch hoax

This one is self-evident – spoken by Trump to the press on March 8 after the Manafort sentencing.  This is a conflation of “witch hunt” (an attempt to blame and punish people who hold unpopular views and opinions, often under the guise of some other investigation) and “hoax” (to trick into believing as genuine something false).  Maybe it was used intentionally as shorthand talk, like “Tim Apple”.  A big thanks to Frank King for spotting this timely one.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/video/politics/trump-its-a-collusion-witch-hoax/2019/03/08/973e41b1-cd99-45f0-b9ce-1246390c8248_video.html?utm_term=.8bd8aa0a86f9


That should give us a foot up

Overheard at a meeting.  It is a congruent conflation of “get a leg up”  and “a foot in the door”, both meaning to receive support or an advantage.  “Start off on the right foot” (to have a favorable or positive start) may also be in the mix.  I suppose getting a foot up is just a little advantage?  Kudos to Martin Pietrucha for hearing this one and passing it on.


It holds much weight

Jeremy Bash uttered this one the other night on the Malaphor channel, MSNBC.  It is a mashup of “carries much weight” (to wield importance or influence) and “holds water” (stands up to critical examination).  A subtle and commonly used malaphor.  Props to Frank King for hearing this one.


Tie the tea leaves together

.This was heard on NPR’s “Here and Now” show.  A pundit was talking about trying to predict what the Mueller investigation report will be like, based on all the information that has been released so far.  It is a mashup of “reading the tea leaves” (predicting on little bits of information) and “tie it all together” (finish it up neatly).  “Tie up loose ends” (resolve some issues at the end that are not critical) might also be in the mix.  Tea leaves seem to confuse folks.  Previous malaphors have included “reading between the tea leaves” https://malaphors.com/2017/03/27/reading-between-the-tea-leaves/ and “read between the tea lines” https://malaphors.com/2019/01/24/i-wish-i-could-read-between-the-tea-lines/.  A tip of the hat to John Costello for hearing this one!


The Manafort situation throws the whole incentive system on its head

Columbia Law School professor Berit Berger uttered this one on the MSNBC show “The 11th Hour with Brian Williams”. She was discussing the pardon system and the Manafort case.  This is a mashup of “turn (something) on its head” (to alter something in an unexpected way) and “throw it out the window” (forgotten, disregarded).  “Turning” and “throwing” seems to have caused the mixup here.  A big thanks to Frank King for hearing this one.

 


My hackles were ruffled

This was overheard at a nearby table at breakfast.  This is a brilliant congruent conflation of “ruffle (ones’) feathers” and “raise (one’s) hackles”, both meaning to make one irritated or angry.  “Ruffle” and “raise” both begin with the letter r, possibly contributing to the mix.  By the way, do you know what “hackles” are?  Hackles are the hairs on the back of an animal’s neck, which stick up when the animal feels fearful or angry (late 1800s).  So, the two expressions involve some type of body covering sticking up, a perfect explanation of the mashup.  A bravo to Sam Edelmann who heard this one all the way from India.

I’m worried stiff

Heard on the MSNBC show with Chris Hayes.  This is a conflation of “scared stiff” (utterly terrified) and “worried sick” (very concerned about a person or situation).  I have heard this one a lot.  “Sick” and “stiff” are similar sounding words, contributing to the mashup.  A big thanks to Frank King for hearing this one!

If you liked this one, check out my book on malaphors, “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors”.  It’s available on Amazon for a cheap $7.99.  Just click on the link – https://www.amazon.com/dp/0692652205


He tends to pull things out of his head

Heard on MSNBC by Matt Miller, a former spokesperson for the Justice Department.  He was talking about Rudy Giuliani and his off the cuff (“shoots off the cuff?”) remarks in interviews.  This is a triple congruent conflation of “off the top of one’s head”, “pluck (something) out of thin air”, and “pull (something) out of a hat”, all meaning a random thought.  “Head” and “hat” get confused a lot and that’s what appears to have happened here.  As you know, the usual thing pulled out of a hat is a rabbit.  As “my ol’ pal” notes, tThe more usual metaphor nowadays is “pull things out of his ass” (making things up) which is probably closer to the meaning of what Matt Miller was trying to convey about Giuliani.  For obvious reasons he probably substituted “head” for “ass” at the last second.  Thus the birth of this malaphor.