Let the cards lay where they fall

This beauty was uttered by James Harrison of the Pittsburgh Steelers in a post game interview after the Steelers/Chiefs playoff game.  Regarding the upcoming playoff game against the Patriots, he said “I’ll just go give everything I’ve got,” Harrison told NBC’s Michele Tafoya of the showdown with the Patriots. “Let the cards lay where they fall.”  http://www.si.com/nfl/2017/01/16/nfl-playoffs-steelers-beat-chiefs-james-harrison
This is a mash up of “let the chips fall where they may” (let something happen regardless of the consequences) and “lay your cards on the table” (tell someone honestly what you think or what you plan to do).  The confusion lies in the words “chips” and “cards”, both casino items that can certainly fall off the table from time to time.  A big shout out to Steve Grieme for hearing this one, immediately writing it down, and sending it in!
Did you like this malaphor?  I have plenty more from the sports world in my book, “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors” available on Amazon now!  Click on http://www.amazon.com/dp/0692652205

He would have been driven out of this town on a stake

Oh my.  This beauty was uttered by Sean Spicer, President-Elect Trump’s Press Secretary, talking on ABC’s This Week with George Stephanopoulos.  Here is the context:

“If my boss at the time, Reince Priebus, had gotten the debate questions, and handed them off, he would have been driven out of this town on a stake, and Donald Trump would have been vilified.”

This is a mash up of “run out of town on a rail” (punish someone by public condemnation or ridicule) and “burn someone at the stake” (to chastise or denounce someone severely).  “Head on a stake” might also be in the mix.

In case the Donald is reading, he should check out my “Politics” section on my website and in my book, “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors” (available on Amazon!).  He will find malaphors uttered not only by himself but by other politicians, including Obama, McCain, and the unforgettable Herman Cain. @realDonaldTrump

I received this malaphor from two people at virtually the same time, a first on this website.  So kudos to John Pekich and Mike Kovacs for hearing this one on the Sunday talk news shows and sending it to yours truly!


We really knocked it over the top this year!

A speaker at a company conference was praising the company’s performance for the year.  This is a nice mash up of “knock it out of the park” (do something successfully or an outstanding achievement) and “over the top” (having gained more than one’s goal).   The phrase “knock it out of the park” seems to be a frequent source of malaphors.  I have previously posted such gems as “we really nailed it out of the park” https://malaphors.com/2015/08/18/we-really-nailed-it-out-of-the-park/, “they blew it out of the park” https://malaphors.com/2012/10/27/they-blew-it-out-of-the-park/, and “I need to knock it out of the box” https://malaphors.com/2014/07/21/i-need-to-knock-it-out-of-the-box/.   A big thanks to Rachel for hearing this one and passing it on!

They’re willing to go to the ends of the moon for you guys

This was overheard on a conference call.  It is a nice mash up of “go to the ends of the earth” (pursue to the utmost limit) and I think “love you to the moon and back” (love you forever).  “Promise the moon (to someone)” (to make extravagant promises) and “ask for the moon” (make outlandish request for something) might also be in the mix.   Of course, the speaker might have said this literally, upping the ante on performing a task.  Going to the ends of the earth is not enough.  Kudos to Anthony Kovacs for hearing this one and sending it in to Malaphor Central.

You don’t need to go to the ends of the moon to get the book on malaphors.  Just click to Amazon and type in the title, “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors“, and you can get this cheap but amusing book today!

Well, isn’t that a hard cookie to crack!

This is a nice mash up “tough cookie” (a person who is hard to deal with) and “a tough (or hard) nut to crack” (a difficult task to complete).  It was overheard in a discussion about the difficulty of a task, so the speaker was clearly thinking about the latter idiom.  Nuts and cookies are the culprits in this mix up, with a side order of “tough” as the common denominator.   I think this malaphor is very appropriate this time of year (a few weeks after Christmas) when the holiday cookies begin to get stale.   Incidentally, cookies seem to be the subject of a few malaphors.  Type “cookie” in my search feature to see the ones on this website.  A big thanks to Elizabeth for hearing this one and passing it on!

Nobody in the audience even blinched

This nice word blend of “blinked” and “flinched” was uttered in a unique conversation.  My friend Martin Pietrucha, who contributed the 2016 malaphor of the year (MOTY) “give them a round of hand”, was telling his mother-in-law about his MOTY award, and said that after the guy made the “round of hand” remark nobody in the audience, besides Martin, even “blinched”.  Not sure what a malaphor about a malaphor is called.  It’s almost like seeing a double rainbow. Any ideas out there?  Anyway, a big round of hand to Martin Pietrucha for blurting this one out.

Welcome to my shoes

I am starting 2017 with a bang with one of the best malaphors ever uttered.  It appeared in an article in the Atlantic entitled, “If not Obamacare, Then What?” and contains interviews with Trump voters in rural Pennsylvania.  One person who owns a hair salon was complaining of the rise in premiums on Pennsylvania’s Obamacare exchange.  Frustrated with escalating premiums and deductibles, she said this malaphor.  https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2016/12/if-not-obamacare-then-what/511130/?utm_source=fbb

It is a congruent conflation of “welcome to my world” and “walk a mile in (someone’s) shoes”, both meaning to consider another person’s perspective or experiences.   Kudos to Steve Kovacs who spotted this one and passed it on! An assist to Mike Kovacs for posting the article on Facebook where his brother promptly identified the perfectly formed malaphor.

Did you like this one?  If so, check out THE book on malaphors, “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors”, written by yours truly and available NOW on Amazon!  Just click the link: http://www.amazon.com/dp/0692652205