My old car shit the bucket
Posted: January 18, 2019 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, idioms, kicked the bucket, language, malaphor, shit the bed, wordplay, words Leave a commentMaggie Acker uttered this beauty when talking about her car that stopped running. It is a congruent conflation of “kicked the bucket” and “shit the bed”, both idioms referring to something or someone that died or failed. “Shit the bed” is a relatively new idiom (I found it in the Wiktionary – https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/shit_the_bed ). It usually refers to something that breaks and can’t be repaired, like a cell phone. Interestingly, in the U.K, it means to express surprise. The mental mix up probably also was caused by the similar sounding words “kick” and “shit”. A big, big thanks to John Fischer who heard this one and passed it on.
Negotiating with Trump is like trying to talk to Jello
Posted: January 11, 2019 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: cnn, humor, idioms, language, malaphor, nail jello to the wall, Richard Blumenthal, talking to a wall, Trump, wordplay, words Leave a commentSenator Richard Blumenthal (D-CT) uttered this gem on CNN January 4, 2019. The context is regarding the recent Government shutdown over Trump’s proposed wall. This is a conflation of “like talking to a wall” (a futile conversation because the other party is not listening) and “like nailing Jello to a wall” (a futile attempt at something). Both idioms contain the word “wall” (appropriate in context, right?) and both concern something that is futile (a conversation or an attempt). A hat tip to Tom Justice for hearing this one!
The guardrails are coming off
Posted: January 9, 2019 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: cnn, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, off the rails, Trump, wheels are coming off, wordplay, words 2 Comments
A rose is a rose by any other name
Posted: January 4, 2019 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, Gertrude Stein, Hardball, humor, language, literature, malaphor, MSNBC, Shakespeare, words Leave a commentThis is a nice literary malaphor, uttered on the MSNBC show Hard Ball . It is a congruent conflation of Shakespeare’s “A rose by any other name” and Gertrude Stein’s sentence “a rose is a rose is a rose”, both interpreted as meaning things are what they are. A big thanks to Mike Kovacs for hearing this conflation of two famous lines in literature.
Trump is hunkering in
Posted: December 31, 2018 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: digging in, Elise Jordan, expressions, humor, hunkering down, language, malaphor, malaphors, MSNBC, Trump, wordplay, words Leave a commentThis was uttered by Elise Jordan on MSNBC, as she was describing Trump alone in the White House. It is a congruent conflation of “digging in” and “hunkering down”, both meaning to get started in working on something or alternatively to seek refuge in a particular place. A big thanks to Frank King for catching this one.
Whatever turns your boat
Posted: December 15, 2018 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: books, humor, language, malaphor, whatever floats your boat, whatever turns you on, wordplay Leave a commentOverheard at a WalMart at midnight: two women were talking about another woman’s unusual outfit and one of them uttered this classic malaphor. It is a congruent conflation of “whatever floats your boat” and “whatever turns you on”, both meaning whatever makes you happy. The phrases both begin with “whatever”, and with boats capsizing, you can see where the confusion arises. A big thanks to John Kooser who heard this one while doing some midnight shopping.
If you enjoyed this one, and are thinking about how to fill that Christmas stocking, why not get the malaphor book, “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors”? It’s available on Amazon for a cheap 7.99. Makes a great addition to any bathroom.
Don’t chew with your mouth full
Posted: December 3, 2018 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: don't chew with your mouth open, don't talk with your mouth full, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, words 2 CommentsDid your mother ever tell you this? Well, the submitter’s mom did, and it is a nice conflation of the admonitions “don’t chew with your mouth open” and “don’t talk with your mouth full”. The corollary of course is “don’t talk with your mouth open”, advice many should follow. A big thanks to Timothy Kendall for sharing this one.
Boiled to a head
Posted: November 28, 2018 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: boiled over, come to a boil, come to a head, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, SBNation, words 2 CommentsThis one comes from the sports world. Here’s the full context: “Sunday’s Bills-Jaguars game started off tense when Jalen Ramsey took time from his busy day to remind Buffalo’s players they were trash. That conflict boiled to a head in the third quarter when a brawl erupted on the turf at New Era Field.” Here’s the citation: https://www.sbnation.com/2018/11/25/18111422/jaguars-bills-fight-leonard-fournette-shaq-lawson.
This is a nice conflation of “boiled over” (to become extremely intense or out of control) and “come to a head” (to reach a point of intensity at which action must be taken). “Come to a boil” (to reach a crucial point) is also probably in the mix considering the context. A boil on the skin has a “head” of sorts and so could have been in the writer’s mind. A big thanks to Barry Eigen for spotting this one!
You can look it up in your Strunk and Wagnalls
Posted: November 26, 2018 Filed under: WORD BLENDS | Tags: expressions, Funk and Wagnalls, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, Strunk and White, WORD BLENDS, words Leave a commentNot quite Rowan and Martin. The submitter’s wife uttered this nice word blend, which is a conflation of “Funk and Wagnalls” (dictionary/encyclopedia) and “Strunk and White” (American English writing style guide). The Funk/Strunk rhyming is obviously the culprit here. A big thanks to Martin Pietrucha for hearing this one and sending it in.
If you want to look up “malaphors”, purchase the malaphor book, “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors”, on Amazon. Makes a great stocking stuffer (or fire starter).
It’s petering down
Posted: November 19, 2018 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, Heidi Przybyla, humor, idioms, language, malaphors, Morning Joe, MSNBC, petering out, Trump, winding down, words Leave a commentNo, this was not said in an erectile dysfunction commercial, but rather by Heidi Przybyla on MSNBC’s Morning Joe the other day. She was talking about the Mueller investigation. It is a congruent conflation of “petering out” and “winding down”, both meaning to slowly come to a conclusion or end. Another tip of the hat to Frank King for spotting this one. He has the ears of a hawk.
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