He’s turning over a new lease on life
Posted: July 20, 2018 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: a new lease on life, expressions, humor, idioms, malaphor, malaphors, turning over a new leaf, words Leave a commentThis perfectly formed malaphor is a mashup of “turning over a new leaf” (to change one’s behavior, usually in a positive way) and “a new lease on life” (a new chance for happiness, usually after a hardship). “New” is common to both idioms, and the words “lease” and “leaf” are similar sounding. Both I think contributed to the mental mix up. A big thanks to Martin Pietrucha for sharing this one with the malaphor world.
If you liked this malaphor you’ll love my book on the subject, “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors”, available on Amazon for a cheap $6.99. A must for every bathroom library.
Parents should stick to their ground involving kids’ names
Posted: July 6, 2018 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, hold your ground, humor, idioms, language, malaphor, stick to your guns, words 2 CommentsI guess that means names like Sandy and Muddy? This was spotted on Quora, an internet platform to ask questions and get answers. It is a great congruent conflation of “stick to your guns” and “hold/stand your ground”, both meaning to refuse to yield or compromise. “Ground” and “guns” both start with a G and have a similar sound, hence the mental mix up. A big thanks to Margaret Grover who spotted this one and sent it in!
He’s bald as a bat
Posted: May 19, 2018 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: bald as a coot, blind as a bat, humor, idioms, malaphor, words Leave a commentA work colleague was attempting to describe why a helmet might feel uncomfortable for a customer, saying “Admittedly he’s bald as a bat. This is a nice mashup of “bald as a coot (or cue ball)” (completely bald) and “blind as a bat” (having poor vision). I like the alliteration here but bats indeed have hair. Coots are not bald either. Coots have prominent frontal shields or other decoration on the forehead, with red to dark red eyes and coloured bills. Many, but not all, have white on the under tail. The featherless shield gave rise to the expression “as bald as a coot,” which the Oxford English Dictionary cites in use as early as 1430. A shout out to Gibbon for hearing this one and sending it in.
Enjoyed this malaphor? Then you would love my book “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors”, available on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0692652205
He’s not the brightest fish in the shed
Posted: March 10, 2018 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: humor, idioms, malaphor, malaphors, not the only fish in the sea, wordplay, words Leave a commentIn the continuing series on malaphors describing those who are not very intelligent, I give you this “three way malaphor”. It is a tri-mashup of “not the sharpest tool in the shed” and “not the brightest bulb in the chandelier”, both describing someone who is not very smart, combined with “not the only fish in the sea” (plenty of other suitable persons). I have posted multiple variations of this subject in the past, including “not the brightest knife in the drawer”, “not the brightest bulb in the shed”, and “not the sharpest bulb in the shed”. It just shows that we may want to look in the mirror every once in awhile. A big thanks to Kimberly Gorgichuk for hearing this one and passing it on.
To add salt to injury
Posted: February 16, 2018 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: add insult to injury, eggcorn, eggcorns, idioms, malaphor, malaphors, rub salt in the wound, words 1 CommentThis mixup was found in the following newspaper:
https://www.channelnewsasia.com/news/singapore/commentary-what-can-a-chief-commuter-engagement-officer-do-to-9928296
It is a congruent conflation of “to rub salt in the wound’ and “to add insult to injury”, both meaning to deliberately make someone’s misfortune or unhappiness worse. “Wound” and “injury” are similar meaning words, probably creating the mental mashup. Now if the writer had written “add-in salt to injury” that would be an eggcorn. An eggcorn is a similar sounding phrase spelled differently. Because of the similar sounding words, this is a very common malaphor, with over 2,300,000 hits, according to Google. A big thanks to Eve for spotting this one.
They make you jump through too much red tape
Posted: February 15, 2018 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, idioms, jumping through hoops, malaphor, malaphors, red tape, words Leave a commentThe speaker was referring to insurance companies. This is a nice mix of “jump through hoops” (to complete or face many challenges to achieve something) and “red tape” (bureaucratic rules that are overly strict or tedious). Both expressions refer to a series of challenges or events, contributing to the confusion. “Cutting through red tape” is what the speaker really wants. A big thanks to John Kooser for uttering this one and sending it in.
It’s like putting the wolf in charge of the hen house
Posted: October 30, 2017 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: Chuck Schumer, expressions, humor, idioms, language, malaphor, malaphors, the fox guarding the hen house, Tom Marino, Trump, wolf in sheep's clothing, words Leave a commentThis was uttered by Chuck Schumer when discussing Trump’s nominee, Tom Marino, as Drug Czar. Schumer said Marino’s confirmation would be “like putting the wolf in charge of the hen house”. https://www.upi.com/Top_News/US/2017/10/17/Drug-czar-nominee-Marino-withdraws-from-consideration-Trump-says/9001508246201/
This is a mashup of “the fox guarding the hen house” (assigning the duty of guarding valuable information or resources to someone who is likely to exploit that opportunity) and “a wolf in sheep’s clothing” (a person or thing that appears harmless but is actually dangerous). Now certainly you wouldn’t want a wolf in charge of the hen house either, but the correct idiom only indicts the fox. A big thanks to Steve Grieme for catching this one and sending it on.
He jumps off the handle too soon
Posted: June 2, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: Bravo, expressions, flies off the handle, humor, idioms, jump down someone's throat, jumps off the deep end, jumps to conclusions, language, malaphor, malaphors, Tour Group, words Leave a commentToday’s malaphor is from the first episode of “Tour Group” on Bravo. One of the reality stars describes another cast member as someone who “jumps off the the handle too soon.” Certainly “flies off the handle” (to lose one’s temper) was intended, but what is the mix? Perhaps the speaker was thinking of “jumps off the deep end” (to get deeply involved with someone or something) because of the words jump and off. However, I think the better mix is with “jump to conclusions” (to decide something without all the facts) as both idioms concern doing something quickly without thinking. “Jump down someone’s throat” (to strongly criticize someone) is also a possibility, as one who flies off the handle is also likely to jump down someone’s throat! The culprit here is the action verbs fly and jump, both involving going through the air. A big thanks to Diane Bufter for hearing this one and sending it in!
If you enjoyed this one and the analysis of mental hiccups, check out my book “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors” on Amazon at http://www.amazon.com/dp/0692652205. You won’t be disappointed!
He bent over hoops for me
Posted: February 19, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: bend over backwards, congruent conflation, humor, idioms, jump through hoops, language, malaphor, malaphors, words Leave a commentNow that’s impressive! This ditty was overheard at a benefits hearing where the claimant was referring to someone who was assisting her. It is a congruent conflation of “jump through hoops” and “bend over backwards”, both meaning to do everything possible to please someone or accomplish something. Bending over hoops is probably the ultimate in pleasing someone. The mix up is caused, I think, by the action words bend and jump, and by the similar meanings of the phrases. A shout out to Sam Edelmann who heard this one and passed it along.
Malaphors 
Recent Comments