That really took the starch out of my sails

This is a conflation of several phrases.  The speaker was talking about his near death experience while cycling, so “it knocked the starch out of me” (to be beat up severely) may be in the mix, but I think the better phrase is “it took the starch out of me” (it made me tired or weak) as he was scared.  The other phrase is probably “it knocked the wind out of my sails” (heavy blow to the body) rather than “taking the wind out of my sails” (challenging someone’s boasting or arrogance).  A big shout out to Tom Justice for sending this one in!


Put the metal on the gas

This is a congruent conflation of “put the pedal to the metal” and “step on the gas”, both meaning to speed up.  I heard this one on a tv sports show uttered by Wally Szczerbiak.  He was discussing at halftime that the team behind needed to step it up.

Wally Szczerbiak - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia


That will bring some skeletons crawling out of the woodwork

This is a delightful mixture of “skeletons in the closet” (secrets) and “crawling out of the woodwork” (secrets coming out in the open).  The confusion lies in the two phrases referring to secrets and exposing them.   I heard this in a conversation but I cannot reveal the source as I was sworn to secrecy.  We can’t have these malaphors crawling out of the woodwork, can we?


We have so many hurdles to cross

This is a mash up of “clear a hurdle” (overcome an obstacle) and I think “rivers to cross” , borrowed from the great Jimmy Cliff song “Many Rivers to Cross”, based on the context of the malaphor.   “Crossed the Rubicon” (taken action with no return) also comes to mind.  “Jumping through hoops” (to do extra things to get what you want) might also be in the mix, confusing hoops and hurdles.  Thanks to Sam Edelmann for spotting this one!

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/02/12/sports/football/for-nfl-prospect-michael-sam-upbringing-was-bigger-challenge-than-coming-out-as-gay.html?_r=3

 

Jimmy Cliff. | reggae singles sleeves


They were going butt-to-butt

In describing an angry argument, the speaker uttered this malaphor, a mash up of the phrases “head-to-head” and “butting heads”, both describing a confrontation or argument.  Head butting also comes to mind, among other images…  I will not display a picture for this malaphor.  Many thanks to Naomi David for giving me this gem!


This is a perfect example of the frying pan calling the kettle black

I am not making these up.  This one was from a commenter (UltraLiberal) in response to a New York Times Op-ed by Gail Collins entitled “The Luck of the Pontiff”  –  http://www.nytimes.com/2014/01/23/opinion/collins-the-luck-of-the-pontiff.html?smid=fb-share&_r=0  The commenter posted:

ULtraliberal

“Anti-Catholicism, with over one Billion Catholics in the world,I don’t think.  Catholics have to worry about extinction,This is a perfect example of the frying pan calling the kettle black.”

This is a mash up of “the pot calling the kettle black”  (criticizing someone for a fault that you have) and “from the frying pan into the fire” (going from a bad situation to a worse situation).  This is similar to previous malaphor postings  – “That’s the cat calling the kettle black” and “look who’s calling the kettle black.”  Obviously this proverb seems to be misunderstood, or at least not remembered correctly.  But then again maybe that’s just me calling the kettle black.  Many thanks to Barry Eigen for spotting this one in the New York Times on-line comments.  
Want to hear for yourself? Collins speaks on Thursday, February 17, at 5 p.m. at Ira Allen Chapel, University of Vermont, Burlington. Institutional sexism


That’s a whole different ball of fish

This is a mix of two phrases with the same meaning – “different ball of wax” and “different kettle of fish” (completely different or not at all similar).   Fish ball soup might also be in the unconscious here (see picture).   This type of malaphor involving phrases with the same or similar meanings is also referred to as a congruent conflation and is usually the most commonly uttered malaphor (and usually the best).  Loyal follower David Spain unintentionally blurted this one out and referred it here.  Thanks David!

Fish Ball Soup ~ Overseas Pinoy Cooking


Wake up and smell the roses

This common malaphor (many hits on the internet) is a mixture of “wake up and smell the coffee” (try to pay attention to what is going on), “come up smelling like a rose” (succeeding from a bad situation) and “stop and smell the roses” (enjoy what’s around you).  The latter was a title to a 1974 hit song by Mac Davis.  This malaphor is similar to “please stop and smell the daisies” published on August 30, 2013.  Many thanks to Sam Edelmann for unintentionally uttering this one and passing it along!

Mac Davis - Stop And Smell The Roses Records, CDs and LPs


Throwing red meat on the fire

This great mash up of “adding fuel to the fire” (making matters worse) and “throwing red meat” (appease or excite followers) was just heard on the local NPR station, WESA.   The speaker may have been thinking of old Boy Scout days of dangling meat on a campfire.   Certainly in most cases red meat needs to be cooked, so it makes sense that the two phrases were mixed up in the recesses of the brain.   The mind is like a big cookie jar, and sometimes when you pull a cookie out it breaks, and you are left with halves of two different cookies.  That is what we do with idioms and phrases, on occasion, and the result is a delectable malaphor.  A big thanks to Rob Blackburn for sending this one in!

Red meat


When all the balls are in line

Christopher Dolan, the California lawyer who is representing the McMath family who has a brain dead daughter, said regarding litigation against the hospital,  “What we needed to know is that when all the balls are in line that we could move quickly and not have to then have any impediments.”  This is a mash up of “ducks in a row” and “fall in line”, both meaning to have things properly organized.  “Stars aligned” might also be in the mix as that phrase also means things happen in an organized way and also line rhymes with aligned.   Also “many balls in the air” might be at play since the speaker used the word balls and was referring to many things happening, although not at once.  Thanks to Ron Marks for sending this one in!

http://edition.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/1401/04/ndaysat.01.html