You’ll end up chasing red herrings
Posted: September 6, 2014 Filed under: herring | Tags: chasing your tail, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, red herring, words 3 CommentsThis is a mash up of “chasing your tail” (busy but not achieving anything) and ” a red herring” (something that misleads or detracts from what is important). This was advice from a Judge to an attorney to have short deadlines to complete writing assignments, otherwise peripheral issues might be focused on that don’t really matter. The combination of the phrases creates a nice new one, meaning wasting time on non essential issues. So don’t sweat the small stuff, people. Interestingly, the origin of the phrase “red herring” supposedly comes from the training of hounds to follow scents. Red herrings would have a strong scent, and would be tied to the tails of hounds to make them concentrate on the actual scent that they were supposed to follow. A big thank you to John Costello for sending this one in.
I’m fuming at the mouth
Posted: September 2, 2014 Filed under: mouth | Tags: congruent conflation, expressions, foaming at the mouth, fuming, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, running on fumes, words 2 CommentsThis is a congruent conflation of “fuming over (someone or something)” and “foaming at the mouth”, both meaning to be extraordinarily angry. The context makes sense: the speaker was trying to make a left turn against oncoming traffic and said, “”I’ll call you back in a minute. I’m fuming at the mouth trying to make this left turn”. “Running on fumes” also may be in the mix, as car fumes might certainly have been on her mind as well. A big thanks to Joseph Newcomer for sending this one in!
You’re too smart for your own britches
Posted: August 30, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, too big for your britches, too smart for your own good, words 2 CommentsThis wonderful congruent conflation is a mash up of “you’re too smart for your own good” and “too big for your britches”, both describing a haughty person. This is a fairly common malaphor, evidenced by the amount of internet hits using this phrase. Contributing to the confusion is the use of the word “too”. Thanks to Sheva Gunnery for hearing this subtle mix up and passing it on!
Why don’t we call and chew his brain?
Posted: August 26, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: chew the fat, expressions, humor, Justin Verlander, language, malaphor, malaphors, Matt harvey, mixed idioms, pick his brain, The Walking Dead, words, zombies Leave a commentNo, this is not a line from The Walking Dead (although maybe it is…). It is a nicely formed malaphor, shared by that malaphor hunter, John Costello. John was speaking to his wife about calling a handyman and this was her response. It is a mash up of “chew the fat” (to chat) and ” pick his brain” (talking with someone to get information about something). I particularly like this one as it conjures up an image that was not intended. This malaphor was also spoken by the pitcher Matt Harvey last year:
Harvey said he did not get a chance to chat with Justin Verlander when the ace made the visit to Port St. Lucie. But Terry Collins , who is close with Tigers manager Jim Leyland, indicated he’d like to make a conversation happen.
“Hopefully I’ll chew his brain a little bit down the road,” Harvey said. “I just sat back and watched.”
http://espn.go.com/blog/new-york/mets/post/_/id/61768/harvey-studied-verlander-before-facing-fish
They made this up out of whole air
Posted: August 25, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, dateline id, expressions, hot air, humor, into thin air, language, make something out of whole cloth, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, words 2 CommentsThis is a mash up of “make something out of whole cloth” (fabricate a lie) and “into thin air” (vanish without a trace). Thin and whole both describe size, which might contribute to the crossed wires. “Hot air” (not sincere with no practical results) might also be in the mix, as the speaker of this malaphor was a lawyer. Specifically, it was heard on “Dateline ID” with Lester Holt. A a defense attorney criticized the prosecution’s description of the accused as a Jekyll-Hyde personality, and then uttered this malaphor. A big thanks to my “ol’ pal”, Beatrice Zablocki for sending this one in.
You have a long road to climb
Posted: August 16, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: a mountain to climb, expressions, humor, language, long road, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, tough row to hoe, words Leave a commentThis mixed idiom is similar to “long road to hoe”, posted April 25, 2013. The phrases in this malaphor include “long road”, “tough row to hoe”, and “a mountain to climb”, all meaning tough or difficult situations. John Costello heard this on the HBO series True Detective, episode 5. Marty is trying to get back with Maggie. Maggie says “you have a long road to climb.” Of course, if you lived in or visited Pittsburgh or San Francisco, you might hear this one used literally. Thanks to John Costello for this one.
This team never put their head between their knees
Posted: August 13, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, expressions, hang your head, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, tail between your legs, words Leave a commentThis phrase stands on its own, describing what one might do if one feels faint, but in context, it is a nice malaphor. The speaker is Tom Seaver, discussing the 69 Mets team and how they came back from adversity and never quit. Pretty sure he was mixing “not putting your tail between your legs” and “not hanging your head”, both expressions meaning not feeling ashamed or embarrassed. “keep your head up” (feeling calm in the face of adversity) also seems in play here. Thanks to Steve Hubbard who heard this on the MLB Network regarding Cinderella teams.
Old dogs rarely change their spots
Posted: August 7, 2014 Filed under: ANIMALS, dog | Tags: a leopard doesn't change its spots, David Baldacci, expressions, Hour Game, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, words, you can't teach an old dog new tricks Leave a commentSometimes my malaphor scouts come across a juicy one in one of the books they are reading. That’s what happened when Steve Hubbard discovered this gem in the “Hour Game” by David Baldacci. Sean King, a major character in the book, utters this mash up:
“If I told you we had information they’d had a knock-down-drag-out three or four years ago over Bobby’s sleeping around, would that surprise you?” “No. He had that reputation. Some people thought he was over it, but old dogs rarely change their spots.”
This is a mash up of “a leopard doesn’t change its spots” (a person’s character, especially if it is bad, will not change, even if they pretend it has) and ‘you can’t teach an old dog new tricks” (it is difficult to make someone change the way they do something when they have been doing it the same way for a long time). Both expressions describe people set in their ways, making this a congruent conflation. And of course Mr. King was referring to that old two timin’ dog Bobby. Thanks again to Steve Hubbard for passing this one along!
I’m walking on ice with you
Posted: August 4, 2014 Filed under: eggs, FOOD | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, skating on thin ice, walking on eggshells, walking on thin ice, words 2 CommentsSounds like a song title, but it actually is a malaphor. The speaker meant to say eggshells instead of ice, and wound up mixing the phrases “walking on eggshells” (try very hard not to upset someone) and “walking (or skating) on thin ice”” (risky situation). The mix up is probably due to ice and eggshells both being easily breakable. Also, if you don’t walk on eggshells with a person who is upset you might be skating on thin ice! A big thank you to Paula Fow for sending this one in.
Might the roosters be guarding the henhouse?
Posted: August 2, 2014 Filed under: ANIMALS, chicken | Tags: chickens come home to roost, expressions, fox guarding the hen house, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, words Leave a commentAh yes, the mixed up world we live in, particularly we baby boomers. This phrase was written in a letter to the editor of The Daily Progress, a Charlottesville Virginia newspaper (wahoo wah). The writer was discussing how a natural gas pipeline was going to go through her property and that the Federal Energy Regulatory Commission approves these 99% of the time. The malaphor is a mash up of “the fox guarding the henhouse” (a job assigned to a person who is exploiting it to his own ends) and “the chickens come home to roost” (facing the consequences of one’s own misdeeds). Thanks to Jack Knoll for sending this one in!
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