Why don’t we call and chew his brain?
Posted: August 26, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: chew the fat, expressions, humor, Justin Verlander, language, malaphor, malaphors, Matt harvey, mixed idioms, pick his brain, The Walking Dead, words, zombies Leave a commentNo, this is not a line from The Walking Dead (although maybe it is…). It is a nicely formed malaphor, shared by that malaphor hunter, John Costello. John was speaking to his wife about calling a handyman and this was her response. It is a mash up of “chew the fat” (to chat) and ” pick his brain” (talking with someone to get information about something). I particularly like this one as it conjures up an image that was not intended. This malaphor was also spoken by the pitcher Matt Harvey last year:
Harvey said he did not get a chance to chat with Justin Verlander when the ace made the visit to Port St. Lucie. But Terry Collins , who is close with Tigers manager Jim Leyland, indicated he’d like to make a conversation happen.
“Hopefully I’ll chew his brain a little bit down the road,” Harvey said. “I just sat back and watched.”
http://espn.go.com/blog/new-york/mets/post/_/id/61768/harvey-studied-verlander-before-facing-fish
They made this up out of whole air
Posted: August 25, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, dateline id, expressions, hot air, humor, into thin air, language, make something out of whole cloth, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, words 2 CommentsThis is a mash up of “make something out of whole cloth” (fabricate a lie) and “into thin air” (vanish without a trace). Thin and whole both describe size, which might contribute to the crossed wires. “Hot air” (not sincere with no practical results) might also be in the mix, as the speaker of this malaphor was a lawyer. Specifically, it was heard on “Dateline ID” with Lester Holt. A a defense attorney criticized the prosecution’s description of the accused as a Jekyll-Hyde personality, and then uttered this malaphor. A big thanks to my “ol’ pal”, Beatrice Zablocki for sending this one in.
You have a long road to climb
Posted: August 16, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: a mountain to climb, expressions, humor, language, long road, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, tough row to hoe, words Leave a commentThis mixed idiom is similar to “long road to hoe”, posted April 25, 2013. The phrases in this malaphor include “long road”, “tough row to hoe”, and “a mountain to climb”, all meaning tough or difficult situations. John Costello heard this on the HBO series True Detective, episode 5. Marty is trying to get back with Maggie. Maggie says “you have a long road to climb.” Of course, if you lived in or visited Pittsburgh or San Francisco, you might hear this one used literally. Thanks to John Costello for this one.
This team never put their head between their knees
Posted: August 13, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, expressions, hang your head, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, tail between your legs, words Leave a commentThis phrase stands on its own, describing what one might do if one feels faint, but in context, it is a nice malaphor. The speaker is Tom Seaver, discussing the 69 Mets team and how they came back from adversity and never quit. Pretty sure he was mixing “not putting your tail between your legs” and “not hanging your head”, both expressions meaning not feeling ashamed or embarrassed. “keep your head up” (feeling calm in the face of adversity) also seems in play here. Thanks to Steve Hubbard who heard this on the MLB Network regarding Cinderella teams.

Old dogs rarely change their spots
Posted: August 7, 2014 Filed under: ANIMALS, dog | Tags: a leopard doesn't change its spots, David Baldacci, expressions, Hour Game, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, words, you can't teach an old dog new tricks Leave a commentSometimes my malaphor scouts come across a juicy one in one of the books they are reading. That’s what happened when Steve Hubbard discovered this gem in the “Hour Game” by David Baldacci. Sean King, a major character in the book, utters this mash up:
“If I told you we had information they’d had a knock-down-drag-out three or four years ago over Bobby’s sleeping around, would that surprise you?” “No. He had that reputation. Some people thought he was over it, but old dogs rarely change their spots.”
This is a mash up of “a leopard doesn’t change its spots” (a person’s character, especially if it is bad, will not change, even if they pretend it has) and ‘you can’t teach an old dog new tricks” (it is difficult to make someone change the way they do something when they have been doing it the same way for a long time). Both expressions describe people set in their ways, making this a congruent conflation. And of course Mr. King was referring to that old two timin’ dog Bobby. Thanks again to Steve Hubbard for passing this one along!
I’m walking on ice with you
Posted: August 4, 2014 Filed under: eggs, FOOD | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, skating on thin ice, walking on eggshells, walking on thin ice, words 2 CommentsSounds like a song title, but it actually is a malaphor. The speaker meant to say eggshells instead of ice, and wound up mixing the phrases “walking on eggshells” (try very hard not to upset someone) and “walking (or skating) on thin ice”” (risky situation). The mix up is probably due to ice and eggshells both being easily breakable. Also, if you don’t walk on eggshells with a person who is upset you might be skating on thin ice! A big thank you to Paula Fow for sending this one in.
Might the roosters be guarding the henhouse?
Posted: August 2, 2014 Filed under: ANIMALS, chicken | Tags: chickens come home to roost, expressions, fox guarding the hen house, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, words Leave a commentAh yes, the mixed up world we live in, particularly we baby boomers. This phrase was written in a letter to the editor of The Daily Progress, a Charlottesville Virginia newspaper (wahoo wah). The writer was discussing how a natural gas pipeline was going to go through her property and that the Federal Energy Regulatory Commission approves these 99% of the time. The malaphor is a mash up of “the fox guarding the henhouse” (a job assigned to a person who is exploiting it to his own ends) and “the chickens come home to roost” (facing the consequences of one’s own misdeeds). Thanks to Jack Knoll for sending this one in!
He caught me in the headlights
Posted: August 1, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: caught up in the moment, expressions, humor, language, like a deer in the headlights, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, words Leave a commentThis is a mash up of “caught up in the moment” (doing something without realizing the consequences) and “a deer caught in the headlights” (so frightened you can’t move or think). A big thank you to Ben Geier for saying this one and passing it on.
Does he think I just fell from the turnip tree?
Posted: July 29, 2014 Filed under: turnip | Tags: expressions, fell off a turnip truck, fell off the wagon, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, the apple does not fall far from the tree, words Leave a commentThe turnip truck idiom seems to be a tough one to remember and say correctly, as it was the subject of another malaphor posted last December, “I wasn’t born off the turnip truck” (December 7, 2013). This new one appears to be a mash up of “fallen off the turnip truck” (someone unsophisticated or naiive) and “the apple does not fall far from the tree” (inherited personality traits). Perhaps “to fall off the wagon” (back to drinking after a period of abstinence) might be in the mix as well. A tip of the hat to John Costello who admits he blurted this one out.
These folks are trying to advance this niche of the pie
Posted: July 26, 2014 Filed under: FOOD, pie | Tags: a piece of the pie, blended idioms, carve out a niche, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, words 2 CommentsA subtle but proper malaphor, this is a mash up of “carve out a niche” (supplying a product for a particular segment of the market) and “a piece of the pie” (a share of something). The mind might be visualizing carving a pie and hence the mix up. Also both expressions concern a focus on a small part of a greater whole. I think the next time I order dessert I will ask for a niche of pie, and see what reaction I get. If the waiter quickly writes down the expression I will know the malaphor love is spreading. A big thanks to Martin Pietrucha for hearing this one and sharing it with malaphor central.
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