This was heard on CNN’s Saturday Morning Table for Five with Abby Phillip. Scott Jennings was defending Trump as usual but also acknowledging high prices, and how people are having a hard time making ends meet. He then made the above statement. This is a mashup of “keeping (one’s) head above water” (able to just manage, usually referring to finances) and I think “keeping (one’s) nose clean” (stay out of trouble). The word “trouble” probably caused the mental hiccup, with Jennings reaching for “nose” instead of “head”. He may also have been visualizing a dog swimming with the nose extended out of the water. A big thanks to Kathy Meinhardt for hearing this one and sending it in!
Heard on April 6. A CNN correspondent was talking about a government lawyer’s legal argument in one of the many cases against the Trump administration. The correspondent opined that “he’s standing on shaky ice”. This is a congruent conflation of “on thin ice” and “on shaky ground”, both meaning to be in a precarious or risky position. This one is similar to a recent post – https://malaphors.com/2025/01/31/on-the-edge-of-very-thin-ice/ . Perhaps the speaker was thinking of a nice cocktail in the future.
Cheers to Tom Justice for hearing this one in his car and immediately sending it in!
On CNN’s YouTube channel there’s a clip entitled ‘Ex-Fox Reporter Reveals Why Tucker Carlson Is Lying About Vaccines’. At the 1:50 mark guest Carl Cameron remarks, “This is literally the metaphor of the lemmings running to their own slaughter”. Here is the clip:
This is a great congruent conflation of “like lemmings to the sea/running off a cliff” and “‘like a lamb to the slaughter”’, both meaning people going innocently and helplessly, without realizing the danger. A tip of the hat to Torre Thompson for spotting this gem. As Torre says, “either way, you’re left with a bunch of dead lemmings.” ‘Nuff said.
James Joseph, senior FEMA administrator, on CNN, told people in Florida not to ignore warnings and think themselves safe from the effects of the oncoming hurricane Dorian. It’s a congruent conflation of “out of the woods” and “in the clear”, both meaning to be free of danger. Perhaps the speaker was thinking of a clearing in the woods. “Out of danger”, also meaning to be free of danger, might also be in the mix. A big thanks to “my ol’ pal” Beatrice Zablocki for hearing this one.
Senator Richard Blumenthal (D-CT) uttered this gem on CNN January 4, 2019. The context is regarding the recent Government shutdown over Trump’s proposed wall. This is a conflation of “like talking to a wall” (a futile conversation because the other party is not listening) and “like nailing Jello to a wall” (a futile attempt at something). Both idioms contain the word “wall” (appropriate in context, right?) and both concern something that is futile (a conversation or an attempt). A hat tip to Tom Justice for hearing this one!
This one is from a CNN news story: “The White House official who was in contact with CNN’s Brown said that with the impending departures of both Chief of Staff John Kelly and Mattis, there is a feeling that the guardrails are coming off. The official says “of course it’s crazy. Anyone looking at this has got to think there’s some craziness going on.”https://www.cnn.com/2018/12/22/politics/shutdown-mattis-whitaker-trump/index.htm
This is a congruent conflation of “off the rails” and “the wheels are coming off”, both meaning a state of chaos or disorder. The words “rails” and “wheels” were confused, probably due to the association of both of them (wheels on a railroad car). Of course, if the guardrails are removed, a state of chaos would probably ensue. A big thanks to Ron MacDonald for spotting this one.
This one comes from Donald Trump, explaining how he’s going to thoroughly investigate the disappearance of Jamal Khashoggi. It is a great mash up of “leave no stone unturned” (to look for something in every possible place) and “leave nothing to chance” (to allow nothing to be settled by chance) or perhaps also “uncover the truth.” The added bonus here is that his mash up manages to mean exactly the opposite of what he intended.
Here is the link: https://www.cnn.com/2018/10/15/politics/trump-saudi-king-tweet/index.html?fbclid=IwAR0oO6TcAWywTPU6JF2RHzKe-sT4Om1yrgqoQe3HHCvX73Xayfp44icHKSI
A big thanks to David Barnes for spotting this one and sending it in.
This excellent malaphor was uttered by a CNN reporter on the program New Day on 8/9/18. The reporter was referring to Mueller, and his ongoing negotiations with Trump’s legal team with respect to an interview with Trump. It’s a congruent conflation of “running the show” and “calling the shots”, both referring to someone who is in control of the situation. “Show” and “shot” are both four letter words that have similar sounds, and I suspect the reason for the mental mix up. A big thank you to Mike Kovacs for hearing this one and sending it in.
This gem was uttered by James Clapper, the former Director of National Intelligence, on CNN’s The Axe Files with David Axelrod. It is a mashup of “double-edged sword” (something that can be both beneficial and problematic) and “two-way street” (a situation where both sides must put forth an equal amount of effort to get a desired result). The reason for the mixup is obvious: “double” means “two”. Also, the two expressions are close in meaning. A big thanks to James Kozlowski for hearing this one and sending it in.
Did you like this mental hiccup? Check out my book on Malaphors on Amazon. It’s called “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors” and is only $6.99! That’s five cents a malaphor. Cheap laughs, right?
This was spoken on June 6 by New York Times’ reporter Maggie Haberman, appearing on CNN’s Inside Politics. It is a subtle mashup of “throw down the gauntlet” (to issue a challenge) and “lay down the law” (to give a directive or order sternly). I suppose one could lay down the gauntlet but throwing it seems much more appropriate. Thisexpressionalludes to themedievalpractice of a knightthrowingdownhisgauntlet, or metalglove, as a challenge to combat.Itsfigurative usedatesfromthesecondhalf of the1700s. A big thanks once again to Frank King for hearing this one and throwing it my way. @MaggieNYT
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