She doesn’t fly off the cuff

Florida Senate Democrats elected a new leader, Lori Berman. She was praised by many in her party, including State Rep Kelly Skidmore: “Lori is super thoughtful. She really takes her time, gets to know the subject matter,” Skidmore said. “She moves at an appropriate pace. She doesn’t fly off the cuff.” https://www.gazettextra.com/news/nation_world/florida-senate-democrats-change-course-with-new-leader-lori-berman-she-doesn-t-fly-off/article_3942c979-4c90-5ab1-842e-ded936b4aa67.html

This is a mashup of “fly off (the handle)” (lose one’s temper suddenly and unexpectedly) and “off the cuff” (speak spontaneously and frankly). It’s a beautiful malaphor, expressing someone with sudden rage and outspokenness at the same time. The “off the cuff” idiom has been unintentionally blended in many ways, and you can find them on my website by typing “cuff” in the search engine. One of my favorites is “Trump shoots from the cuff”. https://malaphors.com/2015/09/05/trump-shoots-from-the-cuff/

A big thank you to Tom Justice for spotting this one and sending it in.

He’s in deep straits

A friend of the contributor was helping out someone who is having financial difficulties. He said that the person is in “deep straits”. This is a congruent conflation of “in dire straits”, “in deep shit/trouble/water”, and “in a deep hole”, all referring to being in a very troublesome situation. Or maybe if Deep Purple and Dire Straits got together? A shout out once again to Verbatim for hearing this one and sending it in.

The walls have turned

This one was overheard at a family event. Two family members were talking about the recent Signal-gate controversy. They thought this recent incident may be a problem for the current administration and one uttered this mashup. It is a conflation of “the walls are closing in” (feeling confined, or overwhelmed), and “tables have turned” (going from a weaker/stronger position to a stronger/weaker position). Props to mega contributor Verbatim for hearing this one and sending it in.

Did you like this malaphor? Check out my books on Amazon, including the laughfest, He Smokes Like a Fish and Other Malaphors. It’s a real page burner! https://www.amazon.com/dp/0692652205

Cutting your nose off to suit your face

Another from the Facebook world. Here was the post: “Stupid liberals. Is this the same as cutting your nose off to suit your face?” This is a conflation of “cutting off (one’s) nose to spite (one’s) face” (acting out in a way that injures oneself more than anyone else) and “suit (oneself)” (to do that which fulfills one’s own desires). The malaphor seems a little contradictory, but maybe the poster was referring to extreme plastic surgery? A big thanks to Lou Pugliese for spotting this one and sending it in.

Speaking of my friend Lou, he has written a new thriller, ‘Final Exam’. It is the Don Weston prequel to ‘Blame it on the Moon’. You can get these fine books on Amazon!