He’s in deep straits
Posted: April 4, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphors, mixed idioms, words 1 CommentA friend of the contributor was helping out someone who is having financial difficulties. He said that the person is in “deep straits”. This is a congruent conflation of “in dire straits”, “in deep shit/trouble/water”, and “in a deep hole”, all referring to being in a very troublesome situation. Or maybe if Deep Purple and Dire Straits got together? A shout out once again to Verbatim for hearing this one and sending it in.
The walls have turned
Posted: April 2, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphors, mixed idioms, words Leave a commentThis one was overheard at a family event. Two family members were talking about the recent Signal-gate controversy. They thought this recent incident may be a problem for the current administration and one uttered this mashup. It is a conflation of “the walls are closing in” (feeling confined, or overwhelmed), and “tables have turned” (going from a weaker/stronger position to a stronger/weaker position). Props to mega contributor Verbatim for hearing this one and sending it in.
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Cutting your nose off to suit your face
Posted: March 31, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphors, mixed idioms, words 1 CommentAnother from the Facebook world. Here was the post: “Stupid liberals. Is this the same as cutting your nose off to suit your face?” This is a conflation of “cutting off (one’s) nose to spite (one’s) face” (acting out in a way that injures oneself more than anyone else) and “suit (oneself)” (to do that which fulfills one’s own desires). The malaphor seems a little contradictory, but maybe the poster was referring to extreme plastic surgery? A big thanks to Lou Pugliese for spotting this one and sending it in.
Speaking of my friend Lou, he has written a new thriller, ‘Final Exam’. It is the Don Weston prequel to ‘Blame it on the Moon’. You can get these fine books on Amazon!
He is going to rape this country dry
Posted: March 24, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, idioms, language, malaphor, mixed idioms, Trump, words Leave a commentThis was noticed in a Facebook comment exchange. The commenter was talking about Trump and his control over the Department of Justice and the FBI and what he may do with these government agencies. This is a mashup of “rape the land” (destroy all the resources) and “bleed/suck/milk (something or someone) dry” (take all the resources that someone or something has available). There may also have been a Freudian slip in there. A big thanks to Diana Greenhalgh for spotting this one and sending it in!
I’m living the paradise
Posted: March 17, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, words Leave a commentTwo guys were having a conversation. One asked the other how he was doing, and he replied, “I’m living the paradise”. This is a congruent conflation of “living the dream” and “another day in paradise”, both referring to living an ideal life (but the latter is often used sarcastically). A shout out to Mike Kovacs for hearing this one and sending it in.
Want to really live the paradise? Then read my malaphor book, He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors, available on Amazon now!!
Dead as a button
Posted: March 14, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, golf, humor, language, malaphors, mixed idioms, words 4 CommentsAt a golf outing, one of the players hit a nice tee shot and another exclaimed that the shot was “dead as a button”. This is a conflation of “dead as a doornail” (truly dead) and “on the button” (accurate or exactly right). “Dead on” was probably also swirling around the brain, as it also means exactly right. Kudos to Sandor Kovacs for sharing this one.
Piss cheap
Posted: March 10, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphors, mixed idioms, piss, words Leave a commentThe speaker was out at dinner with his girlfriend, and referred to a certain menu item as “piss cheap”. This is a mashup of “dirt cheap” (very inexpensive) and “piss poor” (very poor quality). The malaphor described the food item perfectly, as it was not only inexpensive but also did not taste good. This mixup could also describe what happens when you drink Iron City beer. Hats off to Luke Doblick for sending this one in!
Hold on to your seatbelts!
Posted: February 26, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphors, mixed idioms, seatbelts, words Leave a commentA jazz professor was about to publish a revised music chart. He then blurted out this congruent conflation of “hold on to your hats” and “buckle your seatbelts”, both meaning that conditions are about to be more difficult or hazardous. Congrats to Grace Runner for hearing and submitting this beauty.
We just might have to wear it on the chin
Posted: February 24, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphors, mixed idioms, words Leave a commentThis one was heard on the PBS radio show, Marketplace. A person was talking about the added tariff cost on beer. This is a mashup of “wear on (for a period of time)” (to continue for a long period of time) and “take (something) on the chin” (endure a hardship). A big thanks to Jim Kozlowski for hearing this one and sending it in!.
It’s just a waste of exercise
Posted: February 21, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: Brandon Johnson, expressions, humor, language, malaphors, mixed idioms, words Leave a commentChicago Mayor Brandon Johnson was trying to work with members of his administration who were inherited from the previous Mayor’s administration, but became frustrated and said “it’s just a waste of exercise”. This is a congruent conflation of “it’s a waste of time” and “an exercise in futility”, both meaning an action or behavior that has no chance of being successful. You can read the malaphor here:
A big thank to Peter H. for spotting this one!
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