It hit all the bells
Posted: June 4, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: bells and whistles, expressions, hit all the right notes, hit the bullseye, hit the spot, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, words Leave a commentThis gem was heard on the PBS Antiques Road Show (Cleveland show). The appraiser was discussing an item that was perfect, and that “hit all the bells.” This is a mash up of “hit all the right notes” (suitable and has a good effect) and “all the bells and whistles” (extra, fancy gadgets and add-ons). “Hit the spot” and “hit the bulls-eye” also may be in play. The malaphor may conjure up the image of a person hitting a glockenspiel or bells in an orchestra, but as a Steeler fan all I can see is the brutal hit on LeVeon Bell last fall. A big thank you to John Hatfield for hearing this one and sending it in!
He jumps off the handle too soon
Posted: June 2, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: Bravo, expressions, flies off the handle, humor, idioms, jump down someone's throat, jumps off the deep end, jumps to conclusions, language, malaphor, malaphors, Tour Group, words Leave a commentToday’s malaphor is from the first episode of “Tour Group” on Bravo. One of the reality stars describes another cast member as someone who “jumps off the the handle too soon.” Certainly “flies off the handle” (to lose one’s temper) was intended, but what is the mix? Perhaps the speaker was thinking of “jumps off the deep end” (to get deeply involved with someone or something) because of the words jump and off. However, I think the better mix is with “jump to conclusions” (to decide something without all the facts) as both idioms concern doing something quickly without thinking. “Jump down someone’s throat” (to strongly criticize someone) is also a possibility, as one who flies off the handle is also likely to jump down someone’s throat! The culprit here is the action verbs fly and jump, both involving going through the air. A big thanks to Diane Bufter for hearing this one and sending it in!
If you enjoyed this one and the analysis of mental hiccups, check out my book “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors” on Amazon at http://www.amazon.com/dp/0692652205. You won’t be disappointed!
You can beat a dead horse to water, but you can’t make it drink
Posted: May 31, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: beat a dead horse, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, words, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink Leave a commentThis is another in a series of “Maraphors”, a punny term coined by Ray Johnston describing malaphors involving horses, which it turns out is quite a few (type in horse in the search field on the website and you will see). This nice mash up of “you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink” (even favorable circumstances won’t force someone to do something one doesn’t want to) and “beating a dead horse” (a particular request is already resolved and any attempt to continue is futile) was uttered by mistake by malaphor follower azrielle. Thanks Azrielle for passing this one along!
Regarding the expression “beating a dead horse”, the first recorded use with its modern meaning is by British politician and orator John Bright, referring to the Reform Act of 1867, which called for more democratic representation in Parliament, an issue about which Parliament was singularly apathetic. Trying to rouse Parliament from its apathy on the issue, he said in a speech, would be like trying to flog a dead horse to make it pull a load.
That’s the crème de le résistance
Posted: May 27, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: Anderson Cooper, cnn, creme de la creme, expressions, Hillary Clinton, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, piece de resistance, words Leave a commentAt CNN’s Democrat Town Hall last February, Anderson Cooper asked Hillary Clinton about her relationship with her grandchild, and she replied with this wonderful malaphor. This is a congruent conflation of “crème de la crème” and “pièce de rèsistance”, both meaning the very best or most important. This mash up was retweeted a lot, and some of the more clever ones were:
“Creme de resistance” is halfway between a latte macchiato and a flat white – Jon Lovett
The Creme de Resistance was DeGaulle’s favorite baked good – Ronald Seyb
I think we just found Hillary’s @benandjerrys flavor: “Creme de Resistance” – Caroline Haubold
For more on this, you can check this link: http://twitchy.com/brettt-3136/2016/02/03/hillary-clintons-grandchild-is-the-creme-de-le-resistance/
A big merci to Steve Grieme for hearing this one and passing it on.
I’m burning the red eye
Posted: May 26, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: burning the midnight oil, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, the red eye, words Leave a commentMy down under nephew uttered this one, meaning to say “burning the midnight oil”. This is a mash up of “burning the midnight oil” (working late, especially studying at night) and “the red eye” (a flight leaving at night and arriving early the next morning). Both expressions refer to late night, and burning conjures up the color red. Also, red eyes tend to have a burning sensation. Kudos to Erik Ivison for accidentally saying this one and passing it on to Uncle Dave Malaphor.
Kick your feet back
Posted: May 25, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, kick back, language, malaphor, malaphors, put your feet up, words Leave a commentRegular malaphor contributor Yvonne Stam heard this one on NPR’s Morning Edition. It is a very subtle congruent conflation of “kick back” and “put your feet up”, both meaning to relax. “Kick up your heels” (doing something you enjoy) might also be in the mix, combining “kick” with a part of the foot. This one is really a nice visual of someone kicking back in an office chair and putting their feet on the desk. Or perhaps a nice martial arts move, as illustrated below. Many thanks to Yvonne for hearing this one and sending it in.
I have an open ear policy
Posted: May 23, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, keep your ears open, language, malaphor, malaphors, open door policy, words Leave a commentA candidate for mayor posted this gem on a community website. This is a mash up of “keep your eyes and ears open” (pay attention to what is happening) and “an open door policy” (a decision by someone in authority to make themselves available at all times). Kudos to John Hatfield for open eyes and spotting this one.
We got nothing but time under the bridge
Posted: May 21, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, nothing but time, water under the bridge, words expressions 1 CommentThis one was overheard at an administrative hearing. It is a mash up of “nothing but (time)” (only; just) and “water under the bridge” (past and unchangeable events). Perhaps the speaker was thinking of the song “Sittin’ on the Dock of the Bay”:
I’m just sittin’ on the dock of the bay, Wastin’ time.
Or maybe “Under the Boardwalk”, where one just is “havin’ some fun”? Or perhaps the speaker just likes to spend time under bridges. We’ll never know. A big thank you to Bill Belanger for hearing this one and sending it in!
They won by the skin of their chinny chin chin
Posted: May 17, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, not by the hair of our chinny chin chin, skin of their teeth, The Three Little Pigs, words 2 CommentsThe speaker blurted this beauty out when she was describing a really close baseball game in which the Pittsburgh Pirates ultimately prevailed. It is a mash up of “by the skin of their teeth” (just barely, narrowly) and “not by the hair on my chinny chin chin” (outright refusal to allow something). Of course, the latter phrase is a line from the nursery rhyme “The Three Little Pigs”, where the pig will not allow the wolf to come into the house. Skin and chin rhyme, and teeth, skin, and chin are all in the same general vicinity, hence the mix up I suppose. I think I will use this one for now on when there is a close call. A big thanks to Dan Fornadel who heard his wife utter this gem and passed it on.
Sometimes you have to just step outside the dots
Posted: May 16, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: connect the dots, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, think outside the box, walk on the wild side, words 2 CommentsSome nice malaphor advice. I believe this is a mash up of “think outside the box” (think freely without adherence to old rules or ideas) and “connect the dots” (to understand the relationship between different ideas and experiences). The words “box” and “dots” are the culprits, both sounding similar. Not sure where “step” comes into play, but perhaps the speaker had in mind “step in the right direction” or “step in line”, or maybe even “walk on the wild side”? I know the speaker is a Lou Reed fan, so that is a real possibility. As in all great malaphors, there is a bit of a mystery how the brain produces one. A shout out to Lisa Davies O’Donnell, the malaphoree, who heard her husband Tim, the malaphorer, say this one.
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