That’s no shirt off my nose

Posted: March 28, 2017 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

This was uttered by Joe Salerno, who apparently rivaled “The Master” (see my book, “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors” available on Amazon, regarding the amazing “Master”) in unintended idiom mixups.  This is just one of them.  Joe had a PhD in English from the University of Michigan so it just goes to show you that everyone coughs up a few malaphors now and again.  This one is a mashup of “that’s no skin off my nose”  (not harmful or bothersome to me) and “give the shirt off my back” (to give anything that is asked for, no matter the sacrifice).  The common words “off my” and the similar sounds of “skin” and “shirt” are culprits here.  Certainly one can rub a nose when taking off a shirt, and that vision might have popped up in the speaker’s mind.   A big thanks to Robert J. Smith for sending this one in and relating stories about the infamous Joe Salerno.  Also a shout out to Joe Rich for appreciating the Joe Salerno malaphors and spreading the good word (or idiom?).

Reading between the tea leaves

Posted: March 27, 2017 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

This one is straight out of the mouth of senior congressional correspondent Manu Raju on CNN’s Inside Politics, discussing who knew what about connections between Russia and the Trump campaign:

And then I asked Schiff the same question. He said he’s not willing to go there. So the question is perhaps is there any intelligence in that regard that they’re not sharing with the committee. With that — we don’t know that yet but reading between the tea leaves that suggests that. The question is the independent prosecutor, that’s something that Schiff called for yesterday.   http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/1703/03/ip.02.html

This is a nice subtle mashup of “reading the tea leaves” (predicting on little bits of information) and “reading between the lines” ((perceiving an obscure or unexpressed meaning).  Both idioms pertain to perceiving or predicting, and both contain the word “reading”.   “Lines” and “leaves” are also similar sounding words.  A shout out to Barbara Artuso for hearing this one and sending it in!

We’re back to square zero

Posted: March 24, 2017 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

This nice malaphor was heard on Season 1 Episode 2 of Cold Case Files; “Killing on Christmas Eve”.
22:39 into episode.   Video is below.  It’s a congruent conflation of “back to square one” and “ground zero”, both meaning starting place or at the beginning.  This is a bookend of a previous posting, “starting from ground one”, posted in 2012.  https://malaphors.com/2012/11/07/starting-from-ground-one/.  Both idioms have numbers – zero and one – contributing to the confusion.  many thanks to Mike Ameel for hearing this one, sharing it, and sending me the video to prove it!  This is not fake news, folks.

This plant is dry as a rock

Posted: March 23, 2017 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

This was said by a friend about a houseplant.  It is a nice mashup of “hard as a rock” (very hard) and “dry as a bone” (very dry).  Bones and rocks are both dry and hard, and are both one syllable words, hence the metaphor mixup.  A big thanks to frequent malaphor contributor Yvonne Stam for hearing this one and sending it in!

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t flog dead horses

Posted: March 22, 2017 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

This was overheard in a check-out line conversation, and is a great piece of “advice”.  It is a nice mashup of “people who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones” (you should not criticize other people who have the same faults as you have) and “flog (or beat) a dead horse” (to insist on talking about something that no one is interested in).   It’s a classic malaphor, incorporating two idioms to make a strange statement.  Horses and houses seem to be the culprit here.  A big thanks to Jeremy of Smoke-Eaters Studio for hearing this one and sending it in!

That’s right up my cup of tea

Posted: March 20, 2017 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Not sure of the context on this one, but it it was uttered unintentionally, making it a nice malaphor.  It is a mix of “not (one’s) cup of tea” (not something one prefers or enjoys) and “right up (one’s) alley” (ideally suited to one’s interests or abilities).  The confusion I think is caused by two idioms that concern someone’s interests or preference. A big thanks to Joe Dolan for sending this one in!

 

The floor to ceiling windows really knock you off your socks

Posted: March 19, 2017 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

This gem was heard on HGTV’s Island Life (Hilton Head episode).  It is a congruent conflation of “knock (someone’s) socks off” (bedazzle or amaze someone) and “knock (someone) off their feet”, both meaning to amaze, bedazzle, or blow someone away.  Certainly the confusion was caused by feet and socks, and the common denominators “off” and “knock”.  A “knock out” also comes to mind, again referring to impressing someone.  Kudos to Robyn Bottoni for hearing this one and sending it in!

My book on malaphors, “He Smokes Like a Fish and other malaphors”, will also knock you off your socks….with laughter!  Get it now on Amazon at http://www.amazon.com/dp/0692652205!

My dog is healthy as a clam

Posted: March 18, 2017 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

In describing his pet’s lifestyle, the speaker accidentally said that his dog was healthy as a clam.  This is a nice mashup of “healthy as a horse” (very healthy) and “happy as a clam” (very happy).  The words healthy and happy are similar in sound and shape, contributing to the mental mix up.  Happy clams seem to be on people’s malaphor minds, as a prior one posted illustrates – “happy as a clam in clover”. https://malaphors.com/2014/08/15/im-as-happy-as-a-clam-in-clover/.   A big thanks to Johann Chancey for saying this one and sending it in!

 

That’s a tough crowd to follow

Posted: March 16, 2017 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

This is a mashup of “a tough act to follow” (a difficult performance or presentation after a successful one by someone else) and  “follow the crowd” (do what everyone else is doing).  The word “follow” seems to be the culprit in this mix up as it appears in both idioms.  As John Polk, the submitter said, “crowds are easy to follow, until they turn into a mob.”  Truer words were never spoken.  A big thanks to “Cliches Gone Wild” John Polk for sending this one in!  His logo for his twitter account @clichesgonewild appears below.

 

They’re right on my coattails

Posted: March 15, 2017 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

This is a nice, subtle malaphor.  It was spoken by Penn State hockey player David Goodwin.  “The thing is, with records like that, yeah I might catch him, but guys like Andrew Sturtz (39 goals) and (Chase) Berger and Denis (Smirnov), they’re right on my coat tails.”  http://ireader.olivesoftware.com/Olive/iReader/CentreDailyTimesPress/SharedArticle.ashx?document=CDTM%5C2017%5C03%5C07&article=Ar00901

This is a mix of “right on my tail” (following someone closely) and “riding (on) the coattails of (someone)” (to benefit from someone else’s success).  The causes for the confusion?  Right and ride sound similar, and both expressions have the word “tail”.   A hat tip to Martin Pietrucha for seeing this one and sending it in!

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