It isn’t wowing you over
Posted: April 9, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, expressions, humor, language, malaphors, words Leave a commentA couple were watching a very popular t.v. show, and the husband clearly was not enjoying it. The wife remarked: “It isn’t wowing you over, is it?” This is a congruent conflation of “wowing (someone)” and “bowling (someone) over”, both meaning to thoroughly impress someone. A big thank you to Barry Eigen who heard this one and sent it in.
Did that malaphor wow you over? If so, check out my malaphor books, “He Smokes Like a Fish” and “Things Aren’t Rosy Dory”, both available on Amazon for cheap!
Tone it back
Posted: March 21, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, expressions, humor, language, malaphors, real mechanic stuff, words Leave a commentOn the youtube video, “Mechanics React to Sketchy Marketplace Ads” from the series Real Mechanic Stuff, the speakers suggested they needed to “tone it back”. This is a conflation of “tone it down” (make something less extreme or harsh) and “roll it back” (reduce the power or importance of something). “Reel it in” (bring in someone or something that one wants) seems to be on their minds, as they stumbled in thought and blurted that expression out shortly afterwards. You can hear the malaphor at 11:17 here:
Props to Doug Pietrucha for hearing this one and sending it in!
Sharp as a whistle
Posted: February 5, 2025 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, expressions, humor, language, malaphors, mixed idioms, words Leave a commentA grandmother was talking about her granddaughter, describing her as “sharp as a whistle”. This is a mashup of “sharp as a tack” (very clever or intelligent) and “clean as a whistle” (completely, entirely, or very neat). Perhaps she is smart and super clean? The malaphor is similar to a previous posting, “tight as a whistle”. https://malaphors.com/2022/03/14/security-is-tight-as-a-whistle/
A big thanks to Sam Edelmann who heard this one and passed it along!
2024 Malaphor of the Year!!
Posted: December 29, 2024 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, expressions, humor, idioms, language, malaphor of the year, malaphors, mixed idioms, words, writing 2 CommentsIt’s that time again and I know everyone has been anticipating this moment. It is NOW time to reveal this year’s Malaphor of the Year. But before I unveil this masterpiece, here are the winners of past years:
2015 – I have a pulse to the ground (submitted by Paula Garrety)
2016 – Let’s give them a round of hand! (submitted by Martin Pietrucha)
2017 – Welcome to my shoes (submitted by Steve Kovacs)
2018 – Whatever turns your boat (submitted by John Kooser)
2019 – My old car shit the bucket (submitted by John Fischer)
2020 – You’re a one-horse pony (submitted by Bruce Ryan and Ron MacDonald)
2021 – The new President says he wants to turn over a new page (submitted by Frank King)
2022 – Backseat Quarterback (submitted by Chuck Hatsis)
2023 – His cards of lies are about to crumble (submitted by Mike Kovacs)
Before I reveal the winner, I want to give a shout out to the runners-up:
#5 Tying themselves in pretzels (May 2024 – submitted by Mike Kovacs). This conflation of “tying”, “twisting”, “knots”, and “pretzels” is a malaphor masterpiece.
#4 He’s a wet toast (December 2024 – submitted by Bruce Ryan). A beautifully descriptive mashup.
#3 They’re like a fish up a tree (February 2024 – submitted by Martin Pietrucha). This conflation describing professional soccer players attempting to play with both legs is a perfect description, improving the underlying idioms..
#2 I’m gonna want to pick your ear on this (September 2024 – submitted by Andy Jacobs). A beautiful visual and conflation had to be my runner-up of the year.
But the winner this year is She was giving me the cold finger, submitted by Jim Weil (September 2024). This new conflated phrase might be the ultimate snub. It is a mashup of “give (one) the finger” (to treat one poorly or display contempt for someone) and “give someone the cold shoulder” (to snub someone).
Happy New Year everyone!
He’s a wet toast
Posted: December 27, 2024 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, expressions, humor, language, malaphors, mixed idioms, toast, words 1 CommentA discussion on Christmas Eve describing a friend gives us this nice malaphor. It is a blend of “wet blanket” (discouraging enjoyment or enthusiasm) and “milquetoast” (lacking vigor, wishy washy), both referring to someone who is boring and dull. It’s not quite a congruent conflation but definitely an excellent description! A big thanks to Bruce Ryan for hearing this one and sending it in.
This is the last malaphor posted for 2024. Stay tuned for what everyone has been waiting for — Malaphor of the Year!
There are lots of stakes
Posted: November 19, 2024 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: All In With Chris Hayes, blended idioms, expressions, humor, malaphors, Melanie Zanona, mixed idioms, words Leave a commentMelanie Zanona, a Capitol Hill reporter, said this malaphor on the All In with Chris Hayes podcast when she was discussing the issue of whether the House Ethics Committee should release the report on Matt Gaetz. You can hear it at 20:15: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/all-in-with-chris-hayes/id1314170606?i=1000677135164
This is a mashup of “a lot at stake” (taking a big risk) and “stakes are high” (risk losing a lot or it will be dangerous). A big thank you to veteran malaphor spotter Frank King for noticing this one and sending it in.
It was a softball layup
Posted: November 6, 2024 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, expressions, idioms, malaphor, words Leave a commentThe contributor’s nephew, who loves just about all sports, uttered this one. It is a congruent conflation of “a softball” and “a layup”, both describing something easy (one is a question and the other a task). A softball layup must be super easy. A big thanks to Verbatim for hearing this one and sending it in.
You can’t change back the clocks
Posted: September 28, 2016 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, Cameron Diaz, can't change the past, can't turn back the clock, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, words 1 CommentIn an interview on Sirius XM’s Radio Andy, Cameron Diaz was referencing growing old gracefully and said ” you can’t change back the clocks”. http://site.people.com/style/cameron-diaz-taught-gwyneth-paltrow-how-to-use-a-blow-dryer-proves-shes-the-ultimate-celebrity-bff/
This is a nice congruent conflation of “can’t change the past” and “can’t turn back the clock”, both meaning that you can’t make things the same as they were in an earlier time. The phrase “change the clock” is often used when switching to daylight savings time and vice versa, so this might have been in the speaker’s mind. A big thanks to Vicki Kovacs for hearing this one!
I’m no expert on this subject by any stretch of the means
Posted: September 21, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: blended idioms, by any means, by any stretch of the imagination, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, words 2 CommentsThis is a mash up of “by any stretch of the imagination” (as much as anyone could imagine) and “by any means” (by any way possible). Both phrases involve extremes, and share the words “by any”, hence the confusion. A salute to Barry Eigen (who by the way is a stretch of the nice) for hearing this one in a class and sharing it with us.
The shit hit the roof
Posted: September 20, 2014 Filed under: PLACES, roof | Tags: blended idioms, expressions, hit the roof, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, shit hit the fan, words 1 CommentWell, maybe in the Hitchcock movie “The Birds”, but in this case, the speaker was trying to say “the shit hit the fan” (when expected trouble materializes) and instead mixed it with “hit the roof” (get angry), creating a juicy (s0rry, wrong description), nice malaphor. Thanks to Katie Hatfield for her malaphor contribution.
Malaphors 
Recent Comments