This was heard on CNN’s Saturday Morning Table for Five with Abby Phillip. Scott Jennings was defending Trump as usual but also acknowledging high prices, and how people are having a hard time making ends meet. He then made the above statement. This is a mashup of “keeping (one’s) head above water” (able to just manage, usually referring to finances) and I think “keeping (one’s) nose clean” (stay out of trouble). The word “trouble” probably caused the mental hiccup, with Jennings reaching for “nose” instead of “head”. He may also have been visualizing a dog swimming with the nose extended out of the water. A big thanks to Kathy Meinhardt for hearing this one and sending it in!
During the long lull before the men’s final of the U.S. Open for tennis began, John McEnroe was talking about how the final was delayed because of the increased security and the closing of the dome because of rain. He said: “It threw a wrinkle into the players.” This is a mashup of “add a new wrinkle” (to bring or contribute a new unexpected aspect) and “throw a monkey wrench into the works” (an unforseen event or action that sabotages a plan). Because of the rain, he might have been thinking of wrinkly tennis players and speaking literally of wrinkles into the players. Or perhaps he was thinking of the reason for the increased security. A shout out to Barry Eigen for hearing this one and sending it in!
“Four veteran Homeland Security agents who helped execute the Trump administration’s arrests of pro-Palestinian foreign academics for deportation testified Tuesday that the orders they received were both highly unusual and described by senior officials as urgent,” Politico reports.
Said agent Darren McCormack, who arrested Columbia University student Mahmoud Khalil: “Somebody at a higher level than the people I was speaking to had an interest in him.”
Said agent Brian Cunningham, who arrested Tufts University student Rümeysa Öztürk: “There were a lot of hands in the fishbowl.”
This is a conflation of “life in a fishbowl” (a place having no privacy) and “too many hands in the pot” (a situation where too many people are involved in a project). Not sure but maybe the agent was averse to saying the word “pot”? A big thanks to John Costello for spotting this one and sending it in!
Conservative activist and Turning Point USA founder Charlie Kirk said Monday he is trusting the Trump administration to handle the files related to disgraced financier Jeffrey Epstein:
“Honestly, I’m done talking about Epstein for the time being. I’m going to trust my friends in the administration, I’m going to trust my friends in the government to do what needs to be done, solve it, ball’s in their hands,” he continued.
This is a congruent conflation of “the ball’s in your court” and “in your hands”, both meaning under one’s control or in possession. Certainly you catch a ball with your hands so the mind sees “ball” and attaches that word to “hand”. in all likelihood. “Out of our hands” may also be in the mix, although the meaning is the complete opposite to what the speaker was trying to convey. Given the context, a Freudian slip?
Kudos to Mike Kovacs for spotting this one and sending it in!
Trump was being interviewed by Maria Bartiromo on Fox yesterday (June 29, 2025). She asked him about the tariffs on China and he responded that Biden had a trillion dollar deficit with China, adding that “he (Biden) let them (China) take them (U.S.) over the coals.” This is a mashup of “rake them over the coals” (call to task or reprimand severely) and “take them to the cleaners” (cheat one out of one’s money or possessions). “Rake” and “take” seem to have confused the speaker here. You can hear this at the :39 mark:
Donald Trump appeared to get a little confused on Tuesday, June 10, 2025, as he attempted to lob an insult at his predecessor during a speech at Fort Bragg. “I’ve known this guy for a long time”, Trump said of former President Joe Biden. “He was never the sharpest bulb”. https://www.thedailybeast.com/donald-trump-says-joe-biden-was-never-the-sharpest-bulb/
This is a congruent conflation of “not the sharpest tool in the shed” and “not the brightest bulb in the pack”, both describing a slow-witted or dull person. While I have posted this one previously (and numerous variations), I thought that given the source and the context I would be remiss if I did not include this great one in the Malaphor library. Shout outs to Peter H, Karl Robins, and Buzz McClain for spotting this one and sending it in!
PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP: I don’t trust you. I don’t trust — I don’t trust a lot of people. I don’t trust you. Look at you. You come in all shooting for bear. You’re so happy to do the interview.
TERRY MORAN: I am happy —
PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP: And then you start hitting me with fake questions. You start tellin’ me that a guy — whose hand is covered with a tattoo —
TERRY MORAN: Alright. We’re back to that.
This is a conflation of “loaded for bear” (fully prepared for a challenge) and “shooting from the hip” (speak recklessly or impulsively). A big thanks to Mike Kovacs for hearing this one and sending it in!
This one was heard on the MSNBC podcast All In with Chris Hayes. It is a mashup of “kowtow” (acting in a subservient manner) and “toe the line” (accept the authority of an individual or group). Both are about conforming in some manner. You can hear the malaphor at 40:26:
Last week on the show Deadline: White House, Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer was talking about Trump and his reckless behavior. He then uttered this nice congruent conflation of “shooting from the hip” and “flying by the seat of (one’s) pants”, both meaning to act or speak impulsively without planning in advance. Can’t help but think “shitting (one’s) pants” (to be extremely frightened) might also have been on the speaker’s mind. Kudos to Steve Messinger for hearing this one and sending it in!
Heard on April 6. A CNN correspondent was talking about a government lawyer’s legal argument in one of the many cases against the Trump administration. The correspondent opined that “he’s standing on shaky ice”. This is a congruent conflation of “on thin ice” and “on shaky ground”, both meaning to be in a precarious or risky position. This one is similar to a recent post – https://malaphors.com/2025/01/31/on-the-edge-of-very-thin-ice/ . Perhaps the speaker was thinking of a nice cocktail in the future.
Cheers to Tom Justice for hearing this one in his car and immediately sending it in!
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