There’s a smoke trail

This malaphor was uttered by Mark Teixeira, discussing Robinson Cano’s suspension for violating MLB drug rules:

“Robbie Cano’s assistant was on the list for Biogenesis,” Teixeira said. “Of course he had his assistant buy stuff for him. Alex Rodriguez got popped by Biogenesis and Melky got popped. They’re his best friends. When someone gets lumped into that group, it’s because there’s evidence, there’s a paper trail, there’s a smoke trail. …

This is a mash up of “paper trail” (written evidence of someone’s activities) and “smoking gun” (indisputably incriminating evidence).  The speaker might also have been thinking about contrails, which are essentially smoke trails from airplanes.  A big thanks to John Costello for spotting this one!

I don’t know what kinda gun she’s been smoking

Okay.  Yes, this was actually unintentionally said on the Maury show last week.  Husband was being accused of kissing his wife’s girlfriend and having an affair behind her back.  The husband denied the accusation and said this malaphor about his wife to Maury.  This is a mash up of “smoking gun” (indisputable sign of guilt) and “what have you been smoking?” (rhetorical question implying that the person is acting strange).  There may be a freudian element here, as the husband might be admitting guilt through the use of a malaphor.  Or maybe I am reading into this more than I should.  A big thank you to John Hatfield for hearing this one!