He looks down in the tooth

Posted: August 5, 2012 | Author: | Filed under: BODY PARTS | Tags: , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

This is a mash-up of “down in the mouth” (gloomy, depressed) and “long in the tooth” (old, past his/her prime).  The confusion here is pretty clear: teeth are in the mouth and the words “down” and “long” are four letter words.  What I can’t recall is whether the speaker was referring to a person who seemed older or more depressed.  Or maybe both as they go hand in hand??

When the rubber hits the fan

Posted: August 5, 2012 | Author: | Filed under: ACTION, THINGS | Tags: , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

This beauty was overheard in a meeting by my friend Gerry.  The speaker, who is about to retire, said that she did not want to be around “when the rubber hits the fan”.  This malaphor combines “where the rubber meets the road” (the moment of truth) and “when the shit hits the fan” (a messy consequence from a secret about to be made public).  Both indicate something about to happen, hence the mix-up.   Any other thoughts?

That’s water over the bridge

Posted: August 4, 2012 | Author: | Filed under: PLACES, THINGS | Tags: , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

This malaphor is said frequently as it blends two idioms – “water under the bridge” and “water over the dam” – that contain the same word (water) and have the same meaning (past and unchangeable events).   Add two words that both describe direction (over and under) and you get a subtle but wonderful malaphor.

They had to pull his arm to compete

Posted: August 3, 2012 | Author: | Filed under: ACTION, BODY PARTS | Tags: , , , , | 1 Comment

Just heard this one from Kevin Hatfield at dinner.  In response to whether Michael Phelps will compete in another Olympics, Kevin said, “they had to pull his arm to compete in this one”.  It is an excellent malaphor, as it sounds just a little off.  It is a combination of “twist his arm’ (beg someone to do something) and “pull my finger” (ask to fart) or “pull my leg” (kidding someone).

I’m going to pull my own load

Posted: August 2, 2012 | Author: | Filed under: ACTION | Tags: , , , , , , | 1 Comment

This one combines perhaps a few idioms, albeit with different meanings – “pull my own weight” (do your fair share of a task), “load off my mind” (a burden relieved), and “load off my feet” (relax and sit down).   Since the words weight and load are similar, the speaker probably just chose the wrong word, resulting in a malaphor which could have interesting connotations.

I screwed myself in the foot

Posted: July 29, 2012 | Author: | Filed under: ACTION, BODY PARTS | Tags: , , , , , | Leave a comment

Oh yes, I heard this one from “the master” one day after lunch.  It is a blend of “shot myself in the foot” and “I screwed up”, creating a delightful and colorful malaphor.  Again, “the master” improved the two idioms and made what I think a more descriptive one.

Spur of the minute

Posted: July 26, 2012 | Author: | Filed under: TIME | Tags: , , , , , , | Leave a comment

I heard this from “the master” several times.  He was never one to do things spontaneously, so I thought this malaphor expressed his actual feelings.  This classic mixes “spur of the moment” with “in a minute”, implying perhaps a bit of hesitancy to a potential spontaneous action?

You’re preaching to the band

Posted: July 22, 2012 | Author: | Filed under: ACTION, THINGS | Tags: , , , , , | 2 Comments

This is a strange malaphor, as the mix-up is not an obvious one – “preaching to the choir” and “jumping on the bandwagon” perhaps?  I heard this on tv years ago.  Maybe the advent of rock bands in new age churches replacing traditional choirs confused the speaker?

On the other token..

Posted: July 21, 2012 | Author: | Filed under: BODY PARTS, THINGS | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

Classic mash-up of “on the other hand” with “by the same token”.   Perhaps the speaker wanted to express both thoughts at the same time?

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