Read my words: Houston does not get out of the first round this year.
Posted: February 13, 2015 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: congruent conflation, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mark my words, read my lips, words Leave a commentIn a discussion about the NBA, this speaker uttered a malaphor that harkens back to the George H.W. Bush era. This is a nice congruent conflation of “mark my words” and “read my lips”, both expressions meaning to pay attention to what I say. Another winner brought to you by Katie Hatfield!
The fence is always greener on the other side
Posted: February 11, 2015 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, on the fence, the grass is always greener on the other side, words 3 CommentsThe speaker was talking about clubs with problems that look at other clubs and assume everything is going smoothly. This is a mash up of “the grass is always greener on the other side” (other people seem to be in a better situation than you, although that might not be the case) and maybe “on the fence” (undecided). A shout out to Daniel Mustard for sending this one in! Daniel needs to ketch up and send in more malaphors.
The jury’s still on the fence
Posted: February 8, 2015 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: expressions, humor, jury is still out, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, on the fence, words Leave a commentThis was heard during a discussion about a type of severe acute malnutrition and whether or not it is caused by protein imbalance. This is a mash up of “the jury is still out” (a decision has not been reached yet) and “on the fence” (undecided about something). Thanks to Katie Hatfield for hearing this one in class and passing it on!
It’s just putty around my fingers
Posted: January 15, 2015 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: congruent conflation, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, putty in my hand, words, wrapped around my little finger Leave a commentThis is another malaphor uttered by Jack de Golia’s wife. It appears to be a congruent conflation of “wrapped around my little finger” and “putty in my hands”, both describing someone easily manipulated or controlled. Both phrases are usually describing a person rather than a thing, so not sure what Ms. De Golia was referring to. Again, idioms referring to body parts are frequently mixed up in the clutter of our minds. Thanks Jack for sending this one in!
Don’t get your panties in a ringer
Posted: January 10, 2015 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: Chris Christie, Dallas Cowboys, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, panties in a bunch, panties in a twist, tits in a wringer, Todd Christie, words Leave a commentThis descriptive malaphor was written by Todd Christie, the brother of NJ Governor Chris Christie, in a Facebook post, reacting to people commenting on the Governor celebrating the Dallas Cowboys playoff win with Jerry Jones in his box suite. It is a mash up of the expressions “don’t get your tit in a wringer” (don’t get in trouble) and “don’t get your panties (knickers) in a twist (bunch)” (don’t get upset over a trivial matter):
Christie’s brother, Todd, took to Facebook to defend the governor, blasting the “non Cowboy fans who have their panties in a ringer” and urging people to “get a life.”
Thanks to Steve Grieme (two in one week!) for catching this one on CBS This Morning last week.
You eat those like water!
Posted: January 7, 2015 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: drink it like water, eat them like candy, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, words Leave a commentThis bizarre malaphor was overheard in the grocery store by Steve Grieme. He said a wife was chastising her husband and realized the phrase was a mixture of “you eat them like candy” (usually referring to someone taking too many items, usually pills) and “you drink that like it was water” (drinking too much, usually alcohol). Of course, the husband may have been on a liquid diet. Thanks to Steve for sending this one in!
Don’t count your chickens before they come home to roost
Posted: January 5, 2015 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: chickens come home to roost, expressions, humor, language, malaphor, malaphors, never count your chickens before they hatch, words 3 CommentsThe speaker really laid an egg in fumbling these two proverbs, “don’t count your chickens before they hatch” (don’t make any plans on something before it happens) and “chickens come home to roost” (consequences of doing wrong always catch up with the wrongdoer). These fowl phrases seem to get mixed up a lot – see “Never count your eggs before they hatch (July 9, 2012 post) , and “Might the roosters be guarding the henhouse?” (August 2, 2014 post). I was eggcited when Sam Edelmann laid this one on me. Now only if the speaker had added cows coming home…
This hits the ticket!
Posted: January 3, 2015 Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: congruent conflations, expressions, hits the spot, humor, just the ticket, language, malaphor, malaphors, mixed idioms, that's the ticket, words Leave a commentThe speaker uttered this beauty after being served a very nice sandwich. This is a great example of a congruent conflation – a type of malaphor mixing two or more phrases with the same or similar meaning. “Hits the spot” and “just(that’s) the ticket” are in play here, both meaning to be exactly right. The congruent conflated malaphors are particularly good, as they sound somewhat correct and evoke a mental double take. A shout out to Marcia Riefer Johnston for hearing this one and passing it on.
2014 in review
Posted: December 31, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized 5 Comments2014 was a good year for Malaphors.com. 58,000 views! Thank you subscribers! For a year in review, see below.
davemalaphor
Here’s an excerpt:
The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 58,000 times in 2014. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 21 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.
Click here to see the complete report.
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