She gave him the green flag

This timely (happy St. Patrick’s Day!) malaphor was discovered in a novel called The Call of Cassandra Rose, Kindle Ebook edition :

“Had I given him the green flag to play away from home?” Thought by main character worried about her husband having an affair.

While it may have just been said by someone who is color-blind (or a race car enthusiast), I think it is actually a great example of an incongruent conflation (mix of two idioms with opposite meanings). I believe this is a mashup of “the green light” (giving permission to proceed) and “a red flag” (a sign of a problem needing some attention). I have several examples of incongruent conflations, including this one: “not the sharpest cookie in the jar” (sharp cookie = someone smart + “not the sharpest knife in the drawer” = not intelligent. https://malaphors.com/2021/01/15/not-the-sharpest-cookie-in-the-jar/

A tip of the Irish flat cap to Margaret Grover for spotting this one and sending it in.

You are getting yourself onto a sticky slope

During a performance review, a manager told an employee that he was getting himself onto a “sticky slope” when describing an overly complicated process the employee was going to put into place for following up on some delegated tasks. This is a mashup of “sticky situation” (a particularly awkward or difficult situation) and “slippery slope” (a dangerous path or route to follow). Both idioms describe a difficult situation, making it nearly a congruent conflation. The contributor of this malaphor said, “the imagery of me trudging up a “sticky slope” towards accountability was enough for me to rethink the process.” A big thank you to William Riley for hearing this one and sending it in!

They really worked their hearts off

There was a story on the news about upgrade work being done at a local historical site.  The person being interviewed said “they really worked their hearts off”. This is a nice congruent conflation of “work (one’s) tail/butt off” and “work (one’s) heart out”, both meaning to work very hard at something. Hearts off to Dave Julian for hearing this one and sending it in! 

That bus has sailed

On the New Rules segment of Real Time with Bill Maher on HBO, Maher is talking about the need to return civility to political discourse, but then said “that bus has sailed.” This is a congruent conflation of “that ship has sailed” and “that train/bus has left the station”, both meaning the act has already been done. This is similar to an earlier post, “that train has sailed”, uttered by Austin Powers in the movie Austin Powers, International Man of Mystery, when he was speaking to a drunk Vanessa:

She was very groovy.
Your dad loved her very much.
If there was one other cat in this world that could have loved her and treated her as well as your dad then it was me.
But unfortunately for yours truly that train has sailed.
Vanessa?
Vanessa? Hello?

A big thanks to Harold Jackson and Paula Garrety, both who heard this one and passed it on.

They cleaned up all their tracks

On the detective show “Will Trent”, episode 6, Will said about criminals he was having trouble finding: “They cleaned up all their tracks.” Certainly makes sense, but it is a mashup of “cover (one’s) tracks” (hide or destroy evidence of one’s past activities) and “clean up (one’s) mess” (make things neat again). A big thanks to Barry Eigen who heard this one and sent it in.

Slam-packed

The host of the “Total Running Productions” YouTube channel said this mashup in a recent video about the new Men’s 3000m world record: “…these record-breaking performances come from the 1980s and also the 1990s, two decades that were slam-packed with steroid controversy.” It is a word blend congruent conflation of “slammed” and “jam-packed” both meaning crowded or full.

As many of you know who follow this blog, a malaphor is usually an unintentional blend of two or more idioms. But occasionally one utters a word blend malaphor, a blend of two words. Slam-packed is a good example.

Someone asked me if my word blend malaphors are actually portmanteaus. I don’t think so. The main difference is that a portmanteau is an intentional word blend while a malaphor is unintentional.  There are other differences:

A portmanteau is a combination of two (or more) words or morphemes, and their definitions, into one new word. A portmanteau word generally combines both sounds and meanings, as in smog, coined by blending smoke and fog. More generally, it may refer to any term or phrase that combines two or more meanings, for instance, the term “wurly” when describing hair that is both wavy and curly.

The word “portmanteau” was first used in this context by Lewis Carroll in the book Through the Looking-Glass (1871), in which Humpty Dumpty explains to Alice the coinage of the unusual words in Jabberwocky, where “slithy” means “lithe and slimy” and “mimsy” is “flimsy and miserable”. Humpty Dumpty explains the practice of combining words in various ways by telling Alice,

‘You see it’s like a portmanteau—there are two meanings packed up into one word.’

My single word blend malaphors are unconscious blends of words to make an unintentional new word. The word sounds or looks correct at first blush, but then on closer examination is incorrect. Examples on my website are “Buckminster Palace” (Buckingham and Westminster, and/or possibly Buckminster Fuller) and “split-minute decision” (split second and last minute). There are many others. Slam-packed is a great addition.

Kudos to Peter H. for spotting this one and sending it in!

I climbed the ropes

This was heard on a podcast interviewing National Hockey League players. One player was recounting how he made his way into the NHL. He started at the bottom, and “climbed the ropes” until he made it in the NHL. This is a mashup of “climb (up) the ladder” (to become increasingly successful) and “learn the ropes” (to learn how to do a particular job or skill). Climbing the ropes was a requirement in most high school gym classes so the speaker may have been thinking of those days. By the way, “ropes” appear in many malaphors (just type in the word in the search engine on my website malaphors.com).

A big thank you to Adam Jacob (aka Andy Jacobs) for hearing this one and sending it in!

It was a five-star home run

This was uttered by an excited football fan who enjoyed the Super Bowl very much this year. It is a conflation of “five-star” (the best there is, usually describing a hotel’s quality) and “hit a home run” (a very successful achievement). Both describe a “top of the notch” thing or event. A big thanks to Verbatim, who heard his/her? nephew blurt out this great malaphor.

Did you enjoy this mental mixup? If so, you might like my malaphor books, “He Smokes Like a Fish and other Malaphors” and “Things Are Not Rosy-Dory: Malaphors from Politicians and Pundits”. Available on Amazon real cheap! https://www.amazon.com/dp/0692652205

He was left out in the dust

A law professor was discussing a case where a party to a lawsuit got nothing. The professor said “he was left out in the dust.” This is a mix of “leave (someone) in the dust” (to leave someone far behind) and “leave (someone) out in the cold” (ignore or do not include someone). Props to Tina Harrison Kooser for hearing this subtle malaphor!

I want them to say what is on their heart

This was heard on a local NBC station, showing an interview with Nick Sirianni, the Philadelphia Eagles football coach the night before the Super Bowl. Sirianni said that he wants his players to get up in front of the team tomorrow and say what is “on their heart”. This is a mashup of “on (one’s) mind” (in one’s thoughts) and “in (one’s) heart” (in the deepest part of one’s feelings or beliefs). I think “wear (one’s) heart on (one’s) sleeve” (to openly desplay emotions) is also in the mix given the context. A big thank you to Bruce Ryan for hearing this one and sending it in!