The snow day threw a loop into things

The speaker was giving a reason for postponing a task.  This is a mash up of  “throw a monkey wrench into the works” (cause problems for someone’s plans) and “throw (someone) for a loop” (cause surprise or confusion).  “Throw” is the common denominator and probably led to the confusion.  I must admit I act a little loopy on snow days.  Thanks to Marcia Riefer Johnston for sending this one in!

This is still the land of the red, white, and blue

This patriotic (?) malaphor was uttered on the t.v. show Law and Order (episode 1, season 6) by the character Nick Capetti (played by the actor John Ventimiglia – of Artie Bucco fame on the Sopranos) when he says to Detectives Briscoe and Curtis, “Hey this is still the land of the red, white, and blue.”   It is a mash up of lyrics, “land of the free, home of the brave” (from the Star Spangled Banner) and “three cheers for the red, white, and blue” (from The Stars and Stripes Forever).   A big USA chant to Martin Pietrucha for hearing this one and sending it in!

We are going to close some ground

This very subtle malaphor was heard on a conference call.  The speaker was indicating that the backlog was starting to get smaller.  This is a mixture of “gaining ground”  and “closing the gap”, both meaning to make progress.  “Close in” might also be in the mix.  From a quick internet search, this malaphor appears to be a common one.  Thanks to Sandy Shultis for sending this one in!

Too many eggs spoil the soup

The speaker was talking about limiting the number of people doing a particular function so it could work better.  This appears to be a mix of “too many cooks spoil the broth” (too many people involved in an activity can ruin it) and “put all your eggs in one basket” (make everything dependent on one thing).   Soup is also broth so I think that is where the word broth comes from.  There is also egg soup which the speaker may have been thinking about.  He may also have been simultaneously thinking how all the people involved were good eggs.   A big thank you to Susan Edwards for hearing this one!

I’m getting the shaft end of the stick

During a game of spades, the speaker uttered this gem in response to receiving a bad hand.  This is a mash up of “getting the shaft” (to be cheated or mistreated) and “the short end of the stick” (receiving the smaller or less desirable part).  I particularly like this one, as short and shaft have the same number of letters and begin with sh.  Also, a shaft is also part of a stick, such as hockey sticks.  Perhaps this is a hockey expression (or should be?)?  I say the speaker should have two minutes in the penalty box.  A tip of the toque to Adam Jacob for hearing this one and sending it in!

Read my words: Houston does not get out of the first round this year.

In a discussion about the NBA, this speaker uttered a malaphor that harkens back to the George H.W. Bush era.  This is a nice congruent conflation of “mark my words”  and “read my lips”, both expressions meaning to pay attention to what I say.   Another winner brought to you by Katie Hatfield!

The fence is always greener on the other side

The speaker was talking about clubs with problems that look at other clubs and assume everything is going smoothly.  This is a mash up of “the grass is always greener on the other side” (other people seem to be in a better situation than you, although that might not be the case) and maybe “on the fence” (undecided).  A shout out to Daniel Mustard for sending this one in!  Daniel needs to ketch up and send in more malaphors.


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