People are going to start walking with their feet

How else? This malaphor was uttered by Martha MacCallum on Fox News. She was talking about the testimony of the Harvard president dancing around the anti Jewish vs free speech argument, and then blurted out this mashup. It is a congruent conflation of “walk away from (someone or something)” and “voting with (one’s) feet”, both meaning to express disapproval by abandoning someone or something. A big thanks to Kathy Meinhardt for hearing this one and sending it in! 


That caught me way out of left field

This one is from Ed Gainey’s lips, who is the mayor of Pittsburgh. He was appearing on the City Cast Pittsburgh podcast and received a question that he didn’t expect. His response was this nice mash up of “came out of left field” (unexpected) and “caught off guard” (unprepared, unwary). Might qualify as a congruent conflation as both expressions concern something unexpected. A big thank you once again to Mike Kovacs for hearing this one and sending it in.


Does a bear shit in the wind?

Brothers-in law were expanding on the warnings in the Jim Croce song, “You don’t mess around with Jim”, when this malaphor was uttered. It is a mashup of “does a bear shit in the woods?” (a rhetorical question in response to a question where the answer is an emphatic yes) and “piss in the wind” (do something that is ineffective or a waste of time). Bottom line is of course it does. A big thanks to Lou Pugliese for hearing this one and sending it in (he was one of the brothers-in-law by the way).


His cards of lies are about to crumble

Yes, my friends, a triple malaphor in the media wilds was discovered by the intrepid malaphor hunter, Mike Kovacs. This beauty was found on the latest episode (Dec. 2, 2023) CBS crime show 48 Hours. Mike captured the malaphor in a sound byte:

This is a mashup of “house of cards” (a weak and fragile plan), “web of lies” (an intricate contrivance of deceit), and “that’s how the cookie crumbles” (accepting the way things happen or develop). The triple malaphor is like spotting the Spix’s macaw (Guy Moody will understand this). Well done, Mike.


On the other side of the spectrum

Chris Hayes on his show All In with Chris Hayes. This is a mashup of “the other side of the coin” (a different way of considering a situation) and “the other end of the spectrum” (extreme contrast). Coins have sides; spectrums have ends. This one can be heard at 29:47:

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/all-in-with-chris-hayes/id1314170606?i=1000636871099

A big thanks to Frank King for hearing this one and sending it in!


I just tried to make sure I was on my Ps and Qs at all times

This one was found in a Philadelphia Inquirer article. Cornerback James Bradberry of the Philadelphia Eagles was talking about his interception of a Josh Allen pass late in the game:

As the game was going, I saw I was getting a lot of targets,” Bradberry said. “I just tried to make sure I was on my Ps and Qs at all times. I tried to make sure I made enough plays so we’d get a victory.”

This is a congruent conflation of “be on (one’s) best behavior” and “mind your Ps and Qs”, both meaning to be exceptionally polite. Not sure why the cornerback had to be polite the whole game, but that’s what he said. As an aside, a good discussion of the etymology of the idiom “mind your Ps and Qs” can be found here: https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/ps-and-qs/

A big thank you to Linda Bernstein for spotting this one and sending it in!


Calmed a lot of feathers

Ali Velshi on the MSNBC show Alex Wagner Tonight said this one. He was saying that when President Biden spoke after the Hamas massacre and pledged unconditional support for Israel “it calmed a lot of feathers”. It is a congruent conflation of “smoothed (one’s) ruffled feathers” and “calmed the waters”, both meaning to attempt to calm or placate someone or something. A big thanks to Mike Kovacs for hearing this one and passing it on!

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Merry Thanksgiving!

Ok, some things in life ARE free. Like the kindle version of my second malaphor book, Things Are Not Rosy-Dory, starting tomorrow, Thanksgiving, until Monday November 27. Merry Thanksgiving everyone! (And the printed version makes a great stocking stuffer, perfect size for that bathroom library).


I’d love to be a mouse on those walls

This is a mashup of “fly on the wall” (an unseen observer or listener) and “still/quiet as a mouse” (silent, without noise). Both idioms involve complete silence and the speaker just mixed her flies and mice. Or, she might have had mice in the walls at one time. Another big thanks to gsdoghouse for hearing this one from friend Candy.


That’s the gravy on the cake

The yuck factor is high on this one.  This is a congruent conflation of “icing on the cake” and “the rest is just gravy”, both meaning an extra enhancement.  Perhaps this one describes a little too much enhancement.   This is very similar to an earlier posting, “that would just be gravy on the icing”, submitted 9 years ago. https://malaphors.com/2014/10/06/that-would-just-be-gravy-on-the-icing/

A tip of the hat to “gsdoghouse” for sending this one in and his/her friend Candy for uttering it.